Fallout: New Vegas (PC, XBox 360, PS3)

We’re going back to the West Coast with this title, back to the world of New Reno, The New California Republic, and Vault City. It’s been a long time since the Vault Dweller thwarted the mutant tyranny of The Master in Fallout 1 — echoes of his accomplishments still reverberate throughout the wasteland. The NCR has expanded far to the east and the battle for Vegas has arrived. As soon as the NCR reached Vegas their rivals to the East, Caesar’s Legion, did the same. Now these two ideologically opposed factions butt heads over the control of Hoover Dam, the major electricity provider for the Mojave Wasteland.

Meanwhile the enigmatic lord of New Vegas, Mr. Robert House, tries to acquire a long lost piece of technology, a small platinum poker chip. He’s spent a lot of cash getting it back and uses the Mojave Express to hire a Courier to deliver it to him. You are this Courier, ambushed by a man named Benny and his hired Great Khan goons. He caught you just outside of the little town of Goodsprings, shot ya in the head, and left ya for dead. Quick action by the local robot guardian, Victor, saved your life — robot got it in his brain to drag you to the local sawbones.

Back on your feet New Vegas is now your playground. Wanna get revenge? Want to leave the past behind and find a new life? Want to explore the wastes and the realms beyond? Go for it, do whatever, there’s no wrong answer. But all roads lead to Vegas and remember, the House always wins.

Robert House, ever smug.

 

History

So, it’s 2008, Fallout 3 was a critical and commercial success, but Bethesda is busy making The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. How do they capitalize on this Fallout Fever, this Nuclear Malady, this Wasteland Zeal? They call up Obsidian Entertainment, a company founded by Black Isle Studios veterans (Remember those guys? The ones who made Fallout 1 and 2). With a team directed by Josh Sawyer, of Interplay fame, they wanted to return to the West Coast and make a game set between Fallout 2 and 3 but Bethesda put their foot down on Pre-Sequeling. They did like the idea of a Vegas based game however. So Obsidian went to work, recycling ideas that were created in the discontinued Van Buren project, to continue the story they had abandoned 4 years ago — recycling things like Caesar’s Legion for instance.

Fallout New Vegas was released on October 19th, 2010. It’s competition was Super Meat Boy (XBLA), Dragon Age: Origins – Ultimate Edition (PC, XBox 360, PS3), and Star Wars: The Force Unleashed II (PS3, XBox 360, PC, Wii, DS).

Experiences

New Vegas is a masterful combination of mechanical complexity and raw experience. Between the quests, how they effect your interactions with the game’s factions and people, and the bizarre — but compelling — scenarios presented in the game and DLC the whole thing hits so many points it would be overwhelming if executed poorly. I would have to say that Obsidian most masterfully executes this dance between mechanic and meaning in The Lonesome Road DLC. It’s hard to believe it accomplishes so much. It was able to revive a character the writers were having a lot of fun with but had to cut, Ulysses.

What started as a mystery brought along by his appearance in playing cards packaged with the pre-order edition evolved into a full blown manhunt in the face of his attitude and presence in the various DLC campaigns. He’s always one step ahead of the player, he’s this enigma that serves as a sort of shadow for The Courier. Except you’re his shadow forever behind him until you finally meet on The Lonesome Road. A figurative high noon, where a shadow meets its source. The pursuit asks questions about player vs. character identity and the nature of identity as a whole. It went as far as to redefine one of the great riddles of the series — I mean, who would Obsidian be if they did not know their history?

In short, this game has a lot of things going on, running the gamut of experiences. It manages to showcase them all without coming off as exhausting or pulling itself in too many directions like, for instance, Elder Scrolls games tend to do

Gameplay

Didja read the Fallout 3 gameplay section? No? Then read that then read this. New Vegas introduces more in depth factions like cities, towns, the NCR, crime syndicates, and New Vegas neighborhoods. When you do right by them, they’ll do right by you and if you take advantage of, or outright kill them, don’t expect them to lend a helping hand. This system interacts independent of karma so you can still be a cold blooded bastard even though the Great Khans treat you like royalty.

Your faction reputation will also effect how certain companions react to you.

The maximum level with no DLC additions has been boosted up to 30 from 20 but you only get half as many base skill points as you did in Fallout 3 and perks are only awarded every other level, so choose wisely. The DLC raises the level cap up to 50 and unlock new perks and character traits.

DID I JUST SAY CHARACTER TRAITS?! That’s right, traits make a triumphant return. Traits are passive and subtle alterations to your character that help customize your aesthetic, narrative realness, or playstyle. For example Four Eyes which confers a perception bonus if the character is wearing glasses or a penalty if they’re not. And of course, I can’t leave out the inclusion of Wild Wasteland. Were you missing all the crazy stuff that used to happen in the classic Fallout games? Spent too much time in 3 searching for The Tardis or Monty Python’s Bridge of Death? Well, take the Wild Wasteland trait and you can now find the peculiar wonders of the Mojave.

They’re really mild but they can add a lot of character to your experience.

The Gush

New Vegas manages an impressive balancing act between elements of Fallout’s past, the completely new, and a cowboy aesthetic in a way that creates a bizarre world composed of the immediately recognizable. Not since Shadowrun’s 6th world have I seen such a cohesive setting with so many disparate elements.

Cowboys shooting robots? Wut? Shit happens in the Mojave.

This game offers far more player choice than the previous installment while keeping it all relevant. The Dam is an important resource whether you support Caesar’s Legion, The NCR, or Mr. House. They will all appreciate your services whether you’re truly devoted to their cause or a simple mercenary. And best yet, if you don’t like any of their ideologies you can flip them all the bird and set out on your own.

Despite being a game about the downfall of mankind and people just barely able to get by Fallout has had very little to do with survival. So long as the character avoids irradiated hellholes the player character need never eat, drink, or sleep. New Vegas introduces Hardcore Mode which gauges a character physical needs and penalizes them if they’re not met. If the game was too easy and you wanted a solid reason to hoard all those cans of beans then Hardcore mode is for you.

This game has got some solid DLC. Vanilla New Vegas has got more than enough content to satisfy a player but if they’re hungry for more then Obsidian has got some side-dishes all set up. I’ve already spoken about That Lonesome Road but New Vegas also includes Old World Blues where the player finds some brain in jars doing science. It’s also got the obligatory take everything from the player and force them to survive scenario in Dead Money. Oh yeah and then there’s…

The Kvetch

Lonely Hearts. It’s not even vanilla. It’s more like water. It’s bland, barely sustaining, but fine. It’s not toxic. It’s just not worth five dollars for a dose.

Behold! The legendary Joshua Graham… and he cleans guns and talks.

Fallout 3 had invisible walls around the edge of the map. A sad result of a finite world, unavoidable in a packaged product. Fallout New Vegas has invisible walls on mountains the player can climb. You’ll be about to crest over the peak and then an invisible wall gently but firmly tells you ‘best go around me, I know it’ll take 10 minutes to make the trek. I know that you can see your destination just beyond me. But I don’t give a fuck.’

The Verdict

Well we’re almost at the 1500 word mark and if it doesn’t show, I wuv this game — I wuv it to death with nuclear arms. I’ve been from one end of it to the other, there are very few areas and locations that I haven’t explored. The vanilla game is ten dollars on Steam and that’s a steal, the Game of the Year edition is only twenty! So if you want a great big, old, retro-futuristic, robot filled, cowboy having, desert wasteland adventure then this is the game you’ve been looking for all this time.

Next Week: Fallout 4

Fallout 3 (PS3, XBox 360, and PC)

Alright, I wanna talk about Fallout 4 but I should probably establish context for my thoughts and feelings first. Which means I could mention the previous installments and what influenced my expectations for the series… or I could do full reviews of Fallout 3 and New Vegas! If you want to kick it old school and see what Fallout was like in 2D check out my Fallout 1 review. (And don’t worry, sometime I will get to the golden gem that is Fallout 2)

Fallout 3 takes place on the East coast of the US this time around. Time to go to Washington DC itself, the heart of the country and the highest on the Geiger Counter — it’s the nation’s capital, you can bet the Chinese nuked the hell out of it. You play as the child of Vault 101’s Doctor (In case you didn’t know, Vaults are shelters designed to endure the nuclear pummeling the surface took). Trapped beneath the Earth your father longed to go to the Wasteland above, something about a Project Purity. But all interaction with the surface is expressly forbidden by order of the Vault’s Overseer. Your father, not a man who likes to be told what to do, escaped despite this. You, desperate for answers, follow and escape as well.

The wastes are not what you expected or were prepared for. Mutants, bandits, dangerous creatures, technologically advanced agents, and strange goings on await you outside the Vault Door. And as always these loose factions are embroiled in a bitter war for survival and dominance.

Rule 1: Don’t mess with the guy with the shoulder mounted, nuclear capable, catapult.

History

At this point in Fallout’s development history things were in rough shape. The combat heavy but story starved Fallout Tactics sold well but was considered non-canon and not as compelling as the originals. Interplay then developed and published Fallout: Brotherhood of Steel, a game very much like Baldur’s Gate: Dark Alliance — and just as disappointing– which sold just as well its fantasy counterpart.

Black Isle Studio was developing Fallout 3 under the code-name Van Buren but in the face of their parent company, Interplay, filing for bankruptcy were forced to cancel. With the rights to Fallout and no way to keep the franchise going to life Interplay sold the Fallout IP to Bethesda for 1.17 million dollars. Long time members of the Fallout development team were saddened about not being able to continue the story.

Bethesda wasted no time using the Gamebryo engine and employing the same team that created The Elder Scrolls: Oblivion to create Fallout 3. Development started slowly but once all of Oblivion’s DLC and add-ons were completed development started on Fallout 3 in earnest. It would continue the legacy of the original games by sharing its focuses on non-linear gameplay, violence, and dark comedy.

Fallout 3 was released on October 28th, 2008. It’s competition was Fable II (XBox 360), LittleBigPlanet (PS3), and Command and Conquer: Red Alert III (PC).

Experiences

Fallout 3 is exceptional at building a mood and atmosphere. It’s filled with vast empty spaces and where there are people desperate for the necessities of life. It’s totally possible to wander 10 minute stretches without running into anything, dangerous or otherwise. There are picnic areas populated by nothing but skeletons, abandoned caves, and all sorts of locations with a little loot and perhaps the remnants of a sad tale.

Yet where there are people, even in the stable places, they’re generally in trouble or need. Between Underworld’s dwindling supply of scrap metal and Ashur’s daughter’s fascination with teddy bears, everyone needs something. And they generally don’t have the manpower to get it — and most self respecting mercs won’t got hunting for stuffed toys.

I don’t have a problem! YOU HAVE A PROBLEM!

But the point is that you can feel it. In the mutants, raiders, and townsfolk they’re all one bad season away from getting wiped out. The mood strikes the player and entices greed or charity. It forces the question ‘Do I give them what I have or keep it because I deserve it more?’

Gameplay

Fallout 3 is a first person RPG shooter. You walk around chat with the locals and if anyone gives you flack, gets in your way, or refuses to listen to reason — whatever excuse you prefer — you can perforate them or bludgeon them to death with your implement of choice. Alternatively, if you don’t trust your ability to click things — or just want some slick camera angles put on your killing — you can use the Vault Assisted Targeting System or VATS for short. VATS stops time and presents the ability to target specific enemy limbs.

‘Don’t shoot for the legs’ they said. ‘It’s not as spectacular’ they said.

The SPECIAL system returns strong and presents numerical representations of a characters Strength, Perception, Endurance, Charisma, Intelligence, Agility, and Luck. Which then determine a characters derived skills — which now has a much smaller list than the previous 2D games… goodbye gambling. Every level the character gains bestows skill points and perks! Perks give the character more specialized advantages such as earning more skill points per level or doing more damage to mutated creatures. Sadly, traits no longer exist and were scrapped for this title.

You’ll wander the wastes and find lots of people who need help. These are great opportunities to influence the wasteland for fun or profit, good or ill. Find a town beset by mutants? You can help ’em out for free and get some warm fuzzies, get a fair wage out of it, or gauge them for cash — you deserve it more anyway right? And besides, who else is gonna risk their neck?

Become that jerk merchant from the end of every RPG! ‘I can’t kill these ghouls for anything less than 1000 caps.’

These choices and actions determine how other people treat you by altering your karma. Karma comes in the good and bad varieties and has a subtle effect on how people treat you. It can even determine which companions will join you on your quest — ‘cept Dogmeat, he don’t give a damn who you kill or why you’re doing it.

Who’s a good boy?

 

The Gush

This game has so many goddam locations and almost all of them have something interesting going on. From the Rebublic of Dave’s current election woes to the mysteries of the Dunwich Building if you pick a direction and start walking you’ll eventually find something cool.

Speaking of places, I really like the settlements of the DC Wasteland. From Megaton to Rivet City I find it really interesting how the people of the wasteland try to eke out a living. They’re also all really well designed physically and efficiently.

Behold! Megaton! Pay no attention to the undetonated bomb in the village pond.

Two words, Three Dog. The player’s armbound computer has a radio and one of the stations on the air is Galaxy News Radio. GNR’s DJ brought the world of Fallout 3 to life for me, commenting on my accomplishments and failings. Three Dog also functions as a miniature tutorial, telling the player simple things about the game. And an opportunity to have some tone setting tunes from the 50s. He also gives the player hints about where to find quests. If Three Dog mentions a mysterious grove of trees out there, you can go find it!

The DLC in this game is really solid. The Pitt and Point Lookout present new environments for the player to explore and Broken Steel continues the game beyond its original finale. Mothership Zeta is… well disappointing but I’ll get to that. Overall it’s definitely worth the purchase — but maybe not at five dollars a pop.

The Kvetch

Why did the Mothership Zeta DLC get created? We could have gotten anything else besides aliens. Aliens were in Fallout 2 and those aliens seemed like they had some sort of mysterious agenda. It was really better left unspoken. But now we’ve got that aliens have no goddam agenda. I see what they’re doing but cannot make sense of it. Whatever, kill them and get some sweet laser guns.

I really don’t like how the finale punishes the player for being intelligent. Spoiler free, there’s a thing that’ll kill the player if they do it. Alternatively, the player can ask a companion who’s not susceptible to the danger danger to take care of it instead. The final cutscene then mocks the player for being unwilling to die an unnecessary death at the ripe age of 21. I guess it doesn’t pay to think creatively for this choice in the game.

The Verdict

Uhhhhh, yeah, this game is awesome. My greatest wish for this game is that I could wipe my memory of it and explore it all again. Now that I know what I’m doing, where I’m going, and what to expect there’s nothing left for me. That being said, this was only accomplished after hours of exploration, searching every nook. The game of the year edition is frequently on sale, full price it’s still only $20, and I highly recommend getting it with the DLC. Playing it again, it’s hard to believe that this game is 8 years old because it still looks fine, plays smooth, and is incredibly fun.

Next Week: Fallout: New Vegas

Lisa: The Joyful (PC, Mac, Linux)

This game is the sequel of Lisa: the Painful so all the trigger warnings from the previous game apply which include physical, emotional, and sexual parental abuse, themes of violence, drug addiction, sexual assault, and suicide.

Also, here’s a spoiler warning. Seriously, I’m gonna spoil the shit out of the ending of Lisa the Painful in the next sentence. Here I go. At the end of Lisa: The Painful Brad tracked Buddy down, found her under guard of the Rando Army,  fought his way through all of them, and even beat Rando himself in order to ‘rescue’ her. Unfortunately, his use of the the drug Joy caused him to mutate into one of the deformed beasts that have dotted the wastes. Buzzo captures the Brad mutant and warns Buddy of the dangers of the road ahead. Rando, battered but still alive, convinces Buddy that they can travel to a safe place nearby.

After Rando recovers enough to travel they come to the border between West Olathe and East Olathe. The border is marked by an obelisk which lists the top gang leaders of the wasteland. Rando implores Buddy to join him in rallying his army and bringing peace to the world. Buddy has a different idea to bring about peace. Brad taught her to be strong, to kill anyone who would try to hurt her. If the world is so hostile then she will rule it by killing the other gang leaders and forcing everyone in the wasteland to bow to her.

History

Lisa the Joyful was DLC for the original game. It was created in response to Lisa Kickstarter reaching its stretch goals. And… that’s about it… it’s 5 dollars.

Fun Fact: Buddy is Dingaling’s least favorite character.

Experiences

After the sheer silliness and exhileration of The Painful, The Joyful comes as a bit of a let-down. The gameplay is fine, the story brings Olathe’s tale to a close but the focus is off Lisa. Lisa’s is a tale of abuse and each of the games has been like seeing the ripples in the pond expanding from the nexus of the Marty’s terrible acts. Lisa: the First features Lisa as the protagonist exploring the realm of her mind. The Painful spreads out to her, remaining kin and failed protector, Brad and how her abuse shaped him and his actions. Then Joyful expands out to the third generation, so to speak, Buzzo, Rando, and Buddy who’s live were touched by Brad and therefore Lisa.

The ripples from Lisa are still present but it’s much more a story about Olathe, a world that I never grew much attachment to. It turns out that, as usual, asking the question is more interesting than answering it. Creating the world of Olathe, depicting a world without women, introducing the themes of abuse and suffering, that was all very interesting. As Olathe’s terminus, this game makes all the fade away.

Get all that? Good, get to killing.

Gameplay

Lisa: The Joyful plays almost exactly the same as its predecessor but it’s different in a series of content amputating ways. Buddy never acquires a gang and so there is no longer  a motley crew of drunken fuck-ups — she is accompanied by Rando but he is but one sober broken man. there are also fewer areas and fewer options in combat. Just about the only thing this game adds is the ability to jump — Brad was too old, Buddy is still young and nimble. She can also don or remove masks to hide her identity or provoke fights from any NPC — anyone who sees that she’s a girl will probably respond violently. Buddy’s techniques also introduce a sort of timed hit mechanic to inflict critical hits and additional effects.

The Gush

This game has a few crucial choices in it which will require separate playthroughs to fully explore. This game really wraps up all the loose ends and because it’s so short it’s not a bother to play through it multiple times. Of course, like the others, this game is full of secrets so look around and take advantage of that jumping ability. In short, it’s short and uses that to its advantage.

The Kvetch

Lisa: The Painful had so many hidden and secret characters and items. I feel like The Joyful with its elimination of companions, and limited items and weapons makes a game where the existence of such hidden things would be pointless. But… those were some of my favorite things! I mean, thanks for not bringing me to any pointless treasure troves but I do miss the joy they brought me.

It’s just you and Rando for most of the game so it’s important to think more tactically than ever before. This game is hard and will push you to use your noggin and your items. Think before you run off, get dunked, use all your items, and then get a save in which it’s nearly impossible to move forward. This game can easily put you in a state where you’ve got to start over because you’ve wasted too many supplies.

The Verdict

Although not nearly as entertaining or interesting as the previous installment — I would say it’s almost stale — I was willing to finish simply because it was so short and I wanted to know the end of the story. All the different endings tie up a lot of loose ends and put a nice bow on the story of Olathe, Brad, Lisa, and all those her experiences touched. For five dollars on Steam, I would get it if you wanted just that final drop of the Lisa experience.

Next Week: Fallout 3

Lisa: The Painful (PC, Mac, and Linux)

Trigger warning: This game includes themes of physical, emotional, and sexual parental abuse. It also includes themes of sexual abuse, drug addiction, and suicide. And although none of those themes are graphically depicting the violence in this game fluctuates frantically from slapstick to sickening.

It’s the end of the world. Every woman in Olathe has been killed in an apocalyptic disaster known only as the White Flash. You play as Brad, a karate master with a strong body but a vulnerable soul. While he’s wandering the wastes, looking for a good place to take his drug of choice, Joy, he finds a baby lying in a bundle on the ground. He takes it back home and discusses with his three friends what is to be done with the child. Upon discovering that it’s a girl — almost definitely the last girl in all of Olathe — Brad vows to keep her safe no matter what, citing that this is his ‘second chance’. Brad names the child Buddy and they live a good life, considering the circumstances. When Buddy is about 14 she is kidnapped from their home. Knowing that the world has been without women for nearly two decades Brad is acutely aware of what will become of her. Brad sets out to return her to safety and battle his inner demons along the way.

Brad is a… man with problems… deep seated problems.

History

The Lisa trilogy was developed by Dingaling Productions, a studio comprised of Austen Jorgensen and whoever he needs to finish the job. Lisa: The First was created by Dingaling in 2012. A short game jammed into RPG maker depicting Lisa’s life. Jorgensen then launched a Kickstarter campaign to cover expenses of Lisa: The Painful in November of 2013. It requested $7,000 and made over twice that much finishing at $16, 492. It included such rewards as an art book, the soundtrack, and the ability to design a gang, party member, NPC, or Villager. Having reached the $10,000 mark Jorgensen agreed to continue the story with DLC known as Lisa: The Joyful.

Lisa: The Painful was released on December 15th, 2014. It’s competition was I Am Bread (PC), Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes (PC), and Captain Toad: Treasure Tracker (WiiU).

Experiences

The first thing I heard about this game was Woolie from Two Best Friends lamenting that he accidentally chose Pain Mode and that Pain Mode makes the save points explode after use. It was at that point I realized what this game was going to be like. It was going to be about suffering, pain, and incredibly difficult choices. A game that demands tactical thinking if Brad and his pals want to get as many of them out alive. The thought was so daunting that I swallowed my pride and played through in normal mode — The Resident Evil typewriter ribbons always turned me off but exploding save points is on a whole other level. From the very beginning this game fostered an atmosphere of despair. Offering curious situations and dark comedy that allowed me to laugh through the pain long enough to keep going.

By now you know that I’ve got potion paralysis and trying to figure which save points to use tactically is a giant headache. But that’s what this game is about.

Gameplay

Lisa is a turn based RPG with platforming elements in the 2D overworld map. Brad explores the land looking for loot, new companions, and whatever he needs to continue down the trail of corpses Buddy’s captors are leaving behind.

Combat is an interesting experience that drunkenly stumbles between incredibly dangerous enemies and some opponents that literally cannot deal damage. Opponents choose attacks randomly from their lists of moves while your characters unleash their techniques with SP — a system very much like the classic mana system — and TP — a system very much like the limit break system. Point being, get your numbers high, try to keep them that way, and try to fight tactically because this game has a lot of limited resources. If you run out of healing items or firebombs there may be no way to restock!

When it comes to Brad’s companions, they come in various shapes and sizes to complement your playstyle. Most of them are useless but excel in certain areas. It’s the player’s responsibility to make their uselessness effective somehow. The big thing about them is that they can all die at various points in the game. Whether an enemy decapitates them or a sadistic gang leader is holding them hostage blind luck or player choice can put your beloved companions into the grave. Point being, there’s a big difference between knocked out and dead.

There are a helluva lot of these bastards. Some cool, some hilariously uncool.

The Gush

When I explained this game to one of my friends they described the actions of the characters in the game as cave-manish and I think that’s a perfect description. The men who wander these wastes are silly, violent, and mostly very stupid. The behavior of these characters depict toxic masculinity at its finest.

It’s also partially inspired by immense boredom. I bet they just do this to pass the time.

The soundtrack in this game might not be conventionally listenable but it compliments the the game perfectly. The soundtrack is distinctly Lisa and I cannot imagine Lisa’s soundtrack being anything else. Between moody atmosphere, bizarre noises, and warbling synth it plays an integral part in crafting Olathe.

Brad, and some of his companions, are addicts to the drug known as Joy. Joy makes the user feeling nothing at all — and to a haunted man like Brad, feeling nothing is bliss. It also refills the users HP and SP in combat and gives them the buff, overjoyed, which significantly increases their damage and critical hit chance. Despite its positive effects, I bet that using it has negative consequences as well… just call it a hunch.

Dingaling doesn’t shy away from this game’s relation to Earthbound. Imagine if the darkness and humor ratios in Earthbound were reversed, leaving a dark and twisted world which occasionally transforms into a comic romp before its shocking and sickening return to reality.

Fuck you. I’ll cry whenever I want… which happens frequently playing this game.

The Kvush

This game’s design is often poor and unsatisfying but it was created that way on purpose. It’s part of the game’s thesis that these things be unsatisfying. This game is not a power fantasy, it’s designed to make you feel bad. Unlike Darkest’s Dungeon’s ‘greater good’ feelings when it comes to sending party members to their demise Lisa offers no empty platitudes. When you let someone die for your sake or any other the game let’s you know that it’s your fault and that you did it because you were selfish — whether for monetary gain or personal preservation it was your choice. To top it off the whole thing is filled with lose lose choices. There is no right option, there’s just your option. You’ve made your house, you have to live in it. It’s dissatisfying, but it’s not in the Kvetch section because it was made to be that way.

The Kvetch

I know that Lisa’s design is made to be punishing but I find it incredibly frustrating that allies not participating in a combat get no experience points. It would be too powerful if they all got full xp regardless of participation but it would be great if they got some sort of runoff. Even if that comes at the expense of the normal party. I know it makes the game easier and less tedious but no one likes a grind of this caliber. I could send my outclassed party members to the Russian Roulette tournament but… I’d rather not.

Jumping off a cliff in the overworld is instant death. This might sound like a no -brainer and seem like a fun quirk but it’s actually really fucking annoying. When I’m walking around I have to be paranoid levels of careful around ropes next to cliffs. If my finger slips and I miss that rope Brad will jump gleeful into the welcome embrace of oblivion — destroying god knows how much progress. Which wouldn’t be so bad if nearly every rope wasn’t put perilously close to said cliffs. I know it’s part of the intentionally painful design but it just turns me into a wreck.

The Verdict

Lisa: The Painful is deliciously depressing, marvelously dark, and filled with reviving doses of humor. If you’re prepared to look into the cold, dark, unflinching, stupid eyes of the most monstrous aspects of humanity then I suggest you check Lisa out. For the low price of $10, it’s not even a risky investment. But I do warn, there are many parts of this game that are not fun, downright dissatisfying,  and downright malicious. There are choices that will push your to the limits. Choices that show sometimes, being selfish is the ‘right thing’ to do.

Next Week: Lisa: The Joyful