Bioshock 2 (PC, Mac, PS3, XBox 360)

This review assumes that you’ve read my previous review for Bioshock. So check it out unless you’re comfortable with your knowledge on the subject.

In the end of Bioshock the hero of that tale left Rapture, alone, with a some Little Sisters, or a legion of splicers — the stories differ. But Rapture was still down there, still biding its time, still going crazier and crazier. Before Rapture’s fall Andrew Ryan hired a psychologist, Sofia Lamb, to stem Rapture’s growing instability. In the absence of Ryan, Atlas, and Fontaine she sidled into power as no one but her could read and control the minds of the splicers. What are her plans? No one is quite sure but it requires the accumulation of large sums of ADAM, something made complicated with the disappearance — or rescue– and age of the first batch of Little Sisters. Older Little Sister’s can’t scavenge the powerful stuff from corpses any more and there are no more little girls in Rapture. So off the Big Sisters go to Iceland and Europe to steal children to become new Little Sisters to continue her experiments.

You play as Subject Delta, a ghost from Lamb’s past, sworn to protect her daughter Eleanor as her Big Daddy. Grown up as Eleanor may be, Delta must find her or he’ll die as part of his Daddy conditioning. Brought back from the dead by Eleanor and with drill at the ready Rapture’s fate will fall to you as you decide what is just and right by Sofia’s sympathizers and the new batch of Little Sisters. The splicers would do well to steer clear of the only Big Daddy who can think, feel… and wield plasmids.

History

Hot on the heels of Bioshock 1 2K started working on Bioshock 2. Originally subtitled Sea of Dreams, this moniker was dropped. Plot and gameplay details were revealed in a 2009 issue of Game Informer. Alongside this 2K launched a website called ‘There’s Something in the Sea’ explaining the tale of Mark Meltzer who was investigating the disappearance of girls who lived on the shore.

Fun Fact: Original designs only contained one Big Sister who would harass Delta for interacting with Little Sisters and would flee when dropped to low enough health. Lead Designer Zak McClendon said they cut it becase it would be unsatisfying to have a foe that the player couldn’t finish off.

Bioshock 2 was released on February 9th 2010. It’s competition was Stalker: Call of Pripyat (PC), Deadly Premonition (XBox 360 and PS3), and Heavy Rain (PS3)

Experiences

One of my favorite parts of Bioshock was the section in which Jack has to disguise himself as a Big Daddy. He gets a special uniform that reduces the damage he takes and gets to guide Little Sisters around to get them to an escape Bathysphere. It was an incredibly frustrating part of the game as the little ones are very fragile, thankfully it was also very short. But like Road Warrior’s Tanker Chase to Fury Road, this game took that short section that people remember prominently and turned it into a full experience. The focus and design expands the idea into everything I wanted it to be. It made me feel powerful and even a little reckless at times, everything I witnessed in Bioshock’s iconic Bouncer Big Daddy archetype.

I can’t count the number of times I charged a splicer and shouted, “get away from her!”

Gameplay

The gameplay itself has not evolved much since Bioshock 1. The story is one that’s completely original but it all leads to the same end, a wild romp through Rapture filled with a few puzzles, moral decisions, gun-play, and hacking. It’s really difficult to talk about it because there’s not much that’s actually different. It’s got the same plasmids and functional reprints of weapons from the first game.

The big new innovative gameplay elements would be walking on the sea floor — which is pretty cool and fun — and adopting Little Sisters. Delta can either harvest Little Sisters on the spot or adopt them to score more ADAM from nearby corpses. Then, Delta can either rescue the poor girl or harvest them anyway. Either way, after Delta has handled the Little Sisters a Big Sister will arrive to attack him. And get ready for a big damn fight. Big Sisters are lithe, small, fast, and have a variety of attacks and methods designed to wreck Delta’s slow lumbering ass. — Oh yeah and Delta’s Eve is fed intravenously so for those who were totally grossed out by all the needles before there are slightly fewer.

That armor might look ramshackle but ADAM has a lot of long term effects.

The Gush

I hope you’re ready for more moral decisions because Bioshock 2 wants to add another layer to things. Delta will be judged for harvesting or rescuing Little Sisters as well as taking the lives of certain defenseless characters — note that I say defenseless, not innocent. Kill too many and well… let’s just say that it might set a bad example.

The character designs are stellar once again. Lamb, Delta, Big Sisters, Little Sisters, and the Splicers are all visually distinct and interesting. Everytime I look at them I see more and more. A lot of work was put into them, I can shoot the bowler hat off of the big muscly guys and that’s just fun.

The new weapons are fitting replacements for Jack’s arsenal. They’re like Jack’s stuff… but for a Big Daddy. A shotgun, machine gun, utility launcher, and spear gun — as opposed to the crossbow — but bigger and badder. And of course, the incredibly powerful wrench has been replaced by the iconic drill. A weapon that will render your opponents into a meaty pulp so long as the fuel lasts.

Yes, this double barreled shotgun does in fact have three chambers for each barrel.

The character models in this game are much improved from the original. They’re smoother, slicker, and generally better looking. I didn’t even realize it, however, until I saw them side by side.

Brigid Tenenbaum goes from this

to…

Very Different. I much prefer the latter.

The Kvetch

The game still tries to play like a horror game sometimes and it just doesn’t fly. In Bioshock 1 I was Jack, a dude with a wrench in a shirt running around getting blown up, clawed at, or shot at by anything I looked at the wrong way. Jack may have been capable enough to defeat those enemies but he was also vulnerable in such a way that I didn’t feel indestructible in his shoes. When I’m in that Big Daddy suit though nothing else matters. When I’m Delta I don’t care what it is, it had better step off me and/or my Little Sister or I’m gonna take it for a spin on the end of my drill and use its flailing torso to bludgeon more splicers to death.

Most of the plot left me a little baffled. It’s totally possible to miss some journal entries and then not know what the Big Sisters are, where the new Little Sisters came from, and how/why Sofia Lamb is trying to take over Rapture. I guess none of that plot is really necessary for the story of ‘you are Big Daddy, save Little Sister’ but it was the secondary draw for the first game and it’s odd for it to be so buried or borderline incomprehensible here.

The hacking minigame is a thing of the past. No longer will we be able to silently play pipe dreams to hack a turret in the middle of combat. Now we must have a slider bar stop on certain sections in real time during a fight. Those elbow joints will be sorely missed.

I guess this is… mer… really normal and not unique at all.

Yes this game has multiplayer… no I don’t know why. I’ve never played it and I’m entirely uninterested in giving it a shot. I came here for Big Daddy action not capture the flag with douchebags on the internet.

Vending machines no longer obnoxiously bellow ‘Welcome to a Circus of Value!’ or ‘Ammo Bandito!’ and I miss that.

The Verdict

If nothing would please you more than the experience of being a Big Daddy, or a shield bearer, or a bodyguard with a license to kill then I can’t recommend Bioshock 2 enough. That being said I didn’t find it as narratively, philosophically, or politically compelling as the original. Not to say that it’s a bad game, I don’t think that it’s objectively bad but compared to the original it comes up short. It retails for $20 on Steam but I think, six years after the fact, it’s worth more like $15 so I’d recommend getting it on sale.

Next Week: Bioshock Infinite

Bioshock (PC, Mac, iOS, PS3, and XBox 360)

A plane crashes into the Atlantic Ocean and there is one miraculous survivor. Stranded in the sea he makes his way to the burning light of a nearby lighthouse. Emblazoned in a marquis above the arch reads ‘Welcome to Rapture’. Inexplicably drawn to a bathysphere deeper within our hero hears words of desperation coming from a nearby radio. The static laden voice asks the survivor to come to Rapture and help him save his wife and child, for Rapture has lost its mind. The survivor cannot speak, he cannot disagree. He would kindly love to.

To the sea floor he goes bound for a city in which the great are not restrained by the weak. Where the human genome has been mapped, a map which they have changed into a canvas. And where a man is entitle to the sweat of his brow.

History

Published by 2K games, and developed by 2K Boston and 2K Australia with help from other 2K teams. Bioshock was planned as the spiritual successor to System Shock 2 after 2K got bored of making games in the future/space. The original idea did take place in space with a drone, defender, harvester relationship being the primary focus of the game with the player being a sort of brain-washing enthusiast. These themes were too dark and were considered un-publishable but the themes would endure to Bioshock as we know it.

Fun Fact: The underwater 1940s-punk aesthetic of Rapture was created because the team thought cyber-punk was getting a little boring.

Bioshock was released on August 21st, 2007. It’s competition was Wild Arms 5 (PS2), Medieval 2: Total War: Kingdoms (PC), and Lair (PS3).

Experiences

Last week on this very blog I discussed Dishonored, a game that lies to the player too much for all the wrong reasons. This is a game that employs its deception masterfully. I fear I may have gone too far bringing it up but the game is 9 years old and I just have to point out when people do it right. And in this post-Undertale world the line between mechanic and in-game entity are becoming more and more blurry every day… and it makes me giddy.

Gameplay

Bioshock is a first person Action RPG which features a host of weapons, pseudo-magical powers — called plasmids –, tons of upgrades, and hordes of different kinds of enemies who’ll want to mess up your day. The game leads you on a guided tour of Rapture’s most prominent — and deadly — locations as you find more weapons to keep you up to snuff in combat and plasmids to widen the design space — seriously, just think of all the things you can do with the power of telekinesis or the ability to shoot lightning… in an underwater city.

Which will become incredibly useful when you’re fighting a woman like this.

No matter what you’ll be fighting your way through Rapture. How you do that is up to you. You can spend ADAM to upgrade or purchase additional plasmids, use dollars to buy ammo from hackable vending machines, or use other machines to upgrade your favorite shooter. All of these being totally viable options.

What’s this ADAM that’s in all caps up there? Why it’s the genetic sensation that’s sweeping the city! ADAM is a miracle material that allows quick and easy manipulation of someone’s genetic code, giving them the power to create fire or summon a cloud of angry bees — warning. Sellers of plasmids are not responsible for unintended genetic rewriting or any damage to the psyche caused by use of such products. How do you get ADAM, well you’ll (harvester) have to get it from the Little Sisters (Drones) but be careful of their Big Daddy bodyguards (defender). What you do with the poor girl is up to you at that point but, just remember, you get more ADAM by performing invasive surgery to get the ADAM out.

Ah, the Little Sister. As iconic as she is creepy.

The Gush

Between weapon, plasmid, and personal upgrades the only wrong way to play the game is not to explore and discover these things — then again, that’d make a helluva challenge. Even if you want to go through the whole game with the wrench as a melee warrior that’s totally possible and even capable of doing more damage than any other weapon in the game.

Holy philosophy Batfellows! Are you ready to see Capitalism, Libertarianism, and even more isms duke it out for control of Rapture? If you’re not then you’d best get ready because that’s what this game is all about.

I’ve got to say, I really like the hacking minigame. I never though pipe dreams could be so much fun!

Or should I say ‘plumbing minigame’?

Rapture might seem too far out to be real but I find it incredibly fascinating that it’s not impossible to build the fabled city. It would be incredibly impractical — and even more expensive — but Andrew Ryan was not a practical man.  The sheer technical possibility of its creation — even in the era of the game the 1940s — shows how much the designers cared about the world they made.

The music in this game is very impressive. I still can’t listen to ‘Welcome to Rapture’  without shedding a tear. It perfectly compliments the visuals musically with ideas of what could have been. Something irrevocably lost, a doomed experiment that could have produced wonders.

The Kvush

I really like the persistent moral choice presented by Bioshock but I feel the good side of the bargain might be too powerful. The big choice is rescuing the Little Sisters and getting a small ADAM supply or killing them — well… they might survive the incredibly invasive surgery — and getting a huge ADAM supply. But if you keep saving the children then you’ll be rewarded with little care packages filled with med kits, unique plasmids, ADAM, money, and even special ammo types. In the end harvesting all of them only offers the player 10% more  ADAM than they would have gotten otherwise. Oh… well, I guess the player doesn’t know that. The player has to trust that their good deeds will be rewarded in what presents itself as a Libertarian utopia. That all of Ayn Rand’s ideas go out the window when someone’s kindness is rewarded. When someone does something just because they feel that butterfly roiling of a good deed. That people feel indebted to those who do right by them. Did I just talk myself out of thinking this was bad design?

I don’t know, did you?

The Kvetch

The final boss SUCKS. After all this buildup and all of these complex psychological themes and intrigue the final boss is a big red jerk you shoot until he dies — three times, just in case one was too easy. The game even has a killer finale leading up to him that had my pulse pounding and my hands sweaty with stress and excitement. But the let down of his defeat could only be saved by the game’s stellar ending. Still, the fight is really boring and plain.

The Verdict

Wet damn this game is good. For twenty dollars on Steam it’s a steal. And that’s not even including buying a used copy for your console machine or how cheap it gets when it’s frequently on sale online. I cannot recommend playing this game enough. I find it incredibly shocking how well it holds up today.

Next Week: Bioshock 2

Dishonored (PC, PS3, PS4, Xbox 360, Xbox One)

Welcome to the city of Dunwall! Where fascism lurks around every corner, the plague is in season, and conspiracy is omnipresent. You play as local badass and Protector the the Empress Corvo Attano. But none of that really matters as in the first 20 minutes of play you get punked by an assassin who kills the Empress right in front of you. To top it all off the Empress’ daughter, Emily, is kidnapped. In short, you’ve been Dishonored if you will. You must take revenge against the people who performed these vile deeds. By blade, shade, or spell you will eliminate those responsible — and maybe put Emily back on the throne… or whatever, I dunno.

History

Dishonored was developed by Arkane Studios lead by Raphael Colantonio and Harvey Smith and published by Bethesda. It seems like development began with the setting and world as a whole, followed by Corvo’s abilities, and then the levels were designed with Corvo’s capabilities in mind. Colantonio was quoted as saying, “we wanted to give [the player] very strong powers, to make [the player] really a badass, but at the same time we didn’t want the game to be too easy,”.

Fun Fact: The implementation of a morality system’s cause and effect was included after John Houston witnessed a tester infiltrate a masquerade ball. Instead of acquiring clues by listening to the other guests, the tester elected to kill them all and sort it all out later. Needless to say, Houston found this disconcerting and added consequences to actions like this.

Dishonored was released on October 9th, 2012. It’s competition was XCOM: Enemy Unknown (PC, PS3, XBox 360), Hotline Miami (PC), and Assassin’s Creed 3 (PS3, XBox 360).

Experiences

Dishonored is the first game that I completed out of spite. My friends and review publications gave it stellar recomendations so I figured I’d give it a shot. I’ll get to my disappointment later but the point is that I couldn’t review the game in good conscience until I finished it, so I did. Every mission I wanted to put it down but I thought, “It’d be a shitty review if I put the game down… maybe it’ll get better.” It never did. It just got harder and more frustrating. The quick-save key will be your best friend… until you save yourself into a shitty situation.

Gameplay

Dishonored is a first person action game with a heavy emphasis on stealth. You’ll have to sneak your way through the diseased and rotten city to reach the target of the day — or night. Whatever blocks you path you can sneak by, disable, kill, ignore, or outrun in any combination or measure. These guards aren’t dumb though, they’ll recognize when things are amiss. From seeing you to spotting bodies, the more alert they become the more aggressive and thorough their searching techniques become.

I mean, they’re not always completely brilliant.

Corvo has a repertoire of magical activated and passive abilities. From the power to teleport, see through objects, and double jump Corvo’s magical powers will improve his chances of survival and eventually lead him to dominate his enemies — both figuratively and literally. Corvo can improve these abilities by finding Whale Bone Runes and Charms so keep an eye out for them.

One of the main aspects of the city is the Chaos level. Actions that Corvo take can increase or decrease the Chaos level. The greater the chaos grows the more plague rat swarms that will appear to feast on the living and the dead as well as an increase of Weepers — basically plague zombies. If you want to really get your murder on then it might have dire consequences down the line for Corvo and his allies.

The Gush

The setting is gloriously atmospheric. The Whale-Punk aesthetic is something I might actually run a roleplaying game in sometime. It creates a world in which knowledge is great in certain areas and yet totally limited in others. I adore something about the absurdity inherent in a world with single shot pistols and giant lightning walls both being relatively recent discoveries.

Samuel, just Samuel. The only character I could bear to listen to for more than a few minutes. The only character I can think of who sounded like he gave a shit on a consistent basis. Samuel the sailor is Corvo’s main transportation and primary source of information. Samuel gives Corvo a short briefing of every area before they arrive and he’s got a sweet scruffy voice. I was always glad to hear him and have him by my side.

Look at that architecture! And while you’re at it check out Samuel’s grizzled mug.

Actually assassinating people is incredibly fun. There are different ways to approach every target and elements of the stage you can use against them. Unfortunately, if you elect to dispatch of them non-lethally, most of these avenues are locked off to you. So… I guess it pays to be good.

In addition to different ways to dispatch your targets there are a myriad of ways to actually reach them. From sewer tunnels to kicking down the front door, there’s no wrong way to reach your victim. Unless you’re trying to be non-lethal. Then the right way is the incredibly sneaky way where no one sees you and you knock out every guard along the way.

The Rant

Before I get to the Kvetch I’ve got to get mad. I’m mad because Dishonored is a game that lies to me three times in the first 30 minutes. Lying to the player is a dicey proposition that should always be approached with caution but is not necessarily a bad thing. I feel though that Dishonored does it wrong.

The first lie I was told was that Corvo Attano is a badass. He might be a badass when I’m in control but as soon as the cutscene starts I’m surprised he doesn’t choke on his own tongue. In the first scene of the game he manages to fail to protect The Empress of Dunwall, which I must remind you is his JOB as Royal Protector. Not only does he fail but he doesn’t even lay a finger on the person responsible. I know that it sets up the Assassin as a bad motherfucker but I’m certain Corvo’s Badassery and the Assassin’s bad motherfucker status could both have been maintained. What if instead of getting force choked and punked Corvo and that Assassin fight for a bit — maybe plug in a combat tutorial or something, I dunno — then when Corvo’s got this guy on the ropes he pulls out the force choke. Now I know I’m good at this whole Royal Protector thing, but I failed because my opponent straight up cheated. It also makes getting magical powers feel more important.

Lie the second is that leaving corpses makes the plague get worse. Rushing through the tunnels of the prison, a tutorial mentions that leaving corpses does just that and this rampant killing will lead to a darker conclusion. Aight, sounds good, leave no trace and all’s well. One of Corvo’s abilities he can put rune points into is called Shadow Kill and makes it so at the first level enemies who die via stealthy means are turned to ash. And at the second level enemies turn to ash no matter how they’re killed. Sounds great, no bodies, no problems. I had to spend eight points on it but it’s worth it to be able to play the game without as guilty a conscience. Wrong. It’s not leaving the bodies, it’s simply the act of killing the guards. Anyone you kill, whether they turn to ash or not, contribute to the plague’s worsening effects. So that’s a save down the tubes unless I feel like being a prick and continuing the murder cycle.

I was too busy letting the rats eat innocents to consider the ramifications of my actions!

The third is much more intangible and definitely doesn’t constitute deception on the part of the game but I’m getting ahead of myself. When I saw the trailers and heard what people had to say about the game I imagined Corvo as a tragic hero. A prisoner taken from his lofty position to become experimental plaything for magic research and what have you. That the iconic mask was a byproduct of the scarring caused by the experiments, the knife being unkind to our dear Corvo. That’s not the case. Corvo is offered magic for… reasons… well no reason at all really. The Outsider bestows magical powers upon him cause they’re cool, yo. And Corvo’s tinkerer buddy Piero makes Corvo the mask for no real reason. Piero says It’s a sort of sentimental thing that will strike fear into Corvo’s enemies. Alright, I’m down, sounds good, maybe there will be like a Batman thing where I can spook guards to sow dissent in their ranks. I can dig it. I make landing in the first mission, choke out a guard, equip my still beating heart in my left hand, blade in my right. I’ve got my spooky mask on and I teleport up to a passerby in the street and she says…

…

That is the wrong fucking answer. That is a completely illogical and immersion shattering travesty of atmosphere and writing. The mask serves no purpose other than to be something cool to put on the front of the game box or to make the cosplay recognizable. Without the mask Corvo would be a cloaked guy with long black hair or something — I can’t even remember what he looks like. I know I can’t hold Arkane Studios to the standards of a game I created in my head but these narrative elements could have some heft instead of none at all.

I mean, they make good binoculars… what a croc.

The Kvetch

Way at the end of the game Corvo encounters assassins that share in his magical powers. The thing being, they don’t take into account Corvo’s abilities in a scene where they imprison him. Well, I mean, it’s not as if you could tell the guy was magical just by looking at him except OH WAIT! The Outsider’s mark is blatantly on Corvo’s hand as a sign of his magical power. So… these assassins put him in a hole and expect everything to be fine — which leads me to believe they are incredibly stupid… or the designers plum forgot all this shit.

What is the Outsider’s deal? He gives Corvo magical powers to make things, “more interesting,” but has excessive boredom and simultaneously near infinite power. He gives Corvo ‘Great Things are Expected of You’ speech #385 and sends him back into the world with a nifty teleport. Seriously, this is a cool character, give him something to do.

Yeah… but why?

I don’t know what to think about the moral decisions the game has you make. Oh wait, yes I do, I find them very unsatisfying.  Assassination targets offer a lethal or nonlethal approach — kill them or soothe your conscience by knowing that they’re merely out of the way. The issue is that the non-lethal solutions often present a fate worse than death and penalize the player with a killer’s reputation otherwise. For instance, one of the nonlethal solutions was to send the targets shaved, mutilated, and mute into mines they owned to die slowly in the horrible conditions. Ironic but certainly not merciful — can’t I just shove them into a cell until we put Emily back on the throne? And I know we have a cell because it’s where we shove the man who’s killed hundreds in his ethically bankrupt experiments to cure the plague. There’s even a situation where instead of murdering a woman there’s an option to send her off in a boat with an admirer who will, “Make her love him.” And that’s considered the moral high ground, or something. I’m willing to choose the lesser of two evils but why not offer me a third legitimately good option? How about not framing non-lethal tactics as being inherently superior to simple and merciful murder? How about that?

The Verdict

If the aesthetic remotely interested you and you’re a fan of stealth games then you could do worse that picking up this game for $20 on Steam. I bashed it pretty hard but if I were better at stealth heavy games then I might have had more fun with it. That being said, the moral decisions are kind of crap and there are parts of the narrative that seem incredibly forced. If you’re able to ignore all that and just want to teleport around ghosting guards then I know you’ll have a good time but I’ll always see this game as something that’s too flawed for me to truly enjoy.

Next Week: Bioshock

Shovel Knight: Plague of Shadows (For Everything Shovel Knight is for. Seriously, that’s a long list.)

Heads up, this review assumes that you’ve read my previous review about Shovel Knight so click here to check that out.

The Order of No Quarter isn’t exactly as united as we were lead to believe in the events of Shovel Knight. The eccentric alchemist, Plague Knight, has hatched a scheme to create the Ultimate Potion. With it, anything could be his — and I do mean anything. Unfortunately he’s missing nine vital ingredients, which happen to be nothing less than a portion of each of the essences of the other knights in the Order, the Enchantress, and Shovel Knight himself — that’s right, this game takes place during his adventure. With the Ultimate Potion nearly within his grasp you take control of the masked maniac himself, Plague Knight, as he journeys across the land to defeat his so called ‘comrades’. The real question though, is what he means to do with the mighty concoction once it’s made.

History

If you want a fuller story of Yacht Club Games and the creation of Shovel Knight then check out the Shovel Knight Review. That being said, Yacht Club expected to make DLC campaigns but they didn’t know which characters to use… so they asked the fans. There was a giant poll for which members of the Order they wanted to play as and Plague Knight, Spectre Knight, and King Knight were the top three. As such, Plague Knight’s expansion was the first to be released. It and all other additional chunks of content are FREE so if you purchase Shovel Knight expect a ghostly present and a crowned present arriving in your future.

Plague of Shadows was released on September 17th, 2015. It’s competition was Undertale (Mac and PC), Armikrog (PC, Mac, and Linux), and Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain (PC, PS3, PS4, Xbox 360, and Xbox One.)

Experiences

Do you remember when I said Shovel Knight was the platformer I was most emotionally invested in? I may have fibbed a bit because it’s Plague of Shadows that really had me following characters and reading really deep into minute pieces of dialogue.  Every little interaction reveals more about what sort of person Plague Knight is, why he joined the Order, and what he means to do with the Ultimate Potion. He’s not just a stock villain. In an Undertale-Esque fashion it’s plain to see how he got caught up in all this and what sort of person he is. And — it makes no sense saying it here but trust me — it’s a delight to watch him dance.

Shovel Knight’s a heroic guy with a lot of regret but Plague Knight is my favorite of the two.

Gameplay

This game plays unshockingly just like Shovel Knight. It’s the same levels and enemies but Plague Knight’s new abilities and play-style make it a unique experience. Unlike Shovel Knight, Plague’s jump is much shorter but he makes up for this with a little double jump and his ability to blast-jump. Plague Knight also differs from his spade wielding foe because he has a ranged attack. This small change makes combat completely different, it turns into a game of keep away where you cascade explosives on your enemies.

Our dear alchemy obsessed friend also has unique secret areas and collectibles. If you see any shining green coins floating around then try to collect them. This bizarre currency is used to unlock more upgrades that Plague can purchase with treasure — alchemy ain’t cheap, y’know. This includes blast effects, bomb fuses, and bomb explosion types — mix and match to destroy your enemies. Speaking of all this, Plague Knight doesn’t actually make all this stuff. His assistant, Mona — she’s the dour woman who lives in the basement by the juice bar — will be doing all this crafting from within Plague Knight’s secret under-village lab.

Ah… the Secret Lab, Plague’s home away from the Explodatorium.

The Gush

I loved all the upgrades. There wasn’t one that I never used. For each component there is a situation for which it is the tool for the job.

Did you ever wonder where Chester got all those relics? Well let’s just say Plague can acquire an arsenal of his own and that he’s got no problem with the barter system. In short, Plague has got a series of very special items at his disposal that have a variety of uses such as mega bombs or a potion that makes HIM deal contact damage to enemies. I recommend finding them all.

Throughout the course of Plague Knight’s adventures he can go anywhere Shovel Knight could go. It’s really interesting to return to these locations and approach them differently. I can tell the designers had a field day thinking of all the ways to get Plague Knight through a Shovel Knight shaped hole…

… both figuratively and literally.

Jumping jackrabbits, Plague Knight is incredibly mobile. Instead of taking attacks to the face like Shovel could you can dodge with all the grace and acrobatics of an explosion. There’s something great about jumping way high up and raining chaos and pain from above. I love how the guy has so much utility and yet lacks a basic melee attack — it really suits his style.

Look at this dapper dude. He’s got style oozing out of his beak.

The Secret Lab is anything but solitary. It’s filled with goons to chat with and blast away — Plague Knight is not a kind boss– Magicist returns from the town above, there’s a goat-man performing mathematical feats, Mona, and a giant oboe creature. It’s really fun to see how they all bounce off each other.

The Final Boss is a real treat in this one. It’s mechanically and thematically satisfying as well as presenting a marvelous challenge.

The Kvetch

I described Plague as being incredibly mobile and sometimes this works against him. It’s incredibly easy to blast-jump into obstacles or into a pit. Between jumping, double jumping, blast jumping, and the Surging Staff’s uppercut it can be a little bewildering to coordinate. It took me a lot of practice to get all this stuff straight and it’s almost required for you to master all this junk to get Plague Knight where he needs to go.

The Verdict

This is a must-have piece of DLC for Shovel Knight and the best part is that IT COMES FREE WITH SHOVEL KNIGHT! That’s 15 dollars for basically two games. To top it all off the game’s got co-op on the WiiU so now you can play with your friends. I cannot recommend it enough and loved it so much I thought I would spontaneously combust.

Next Week: Dishonored

Shovel Knight (PC, 3DS, Wii U, Mac, Linux, PS Vita, PS3, PS4, Xbox One, Amazon Fire TV, and select digging implements everywhere)

 

In a world of knights, kings, ancient magicks, hordes of treasure, and 16 bits there was an inseparable and unbeatable duo of knights, Shovel Knight and Shield Knight. Their adventures took them far and wide to the prestigious and dangerous Tower of Fate. A mysterious amulet wrought a dark spell around Shield Knight. As Shovel Knight came to Shield Knight was gone and the Tower was sealed. With a burden of shame too great for him — and the tower locked in any event — Shovel Knight went into exile. Some time later news reached him that the kingdom was dominated by the brutal Order of No Quarter lead by a bewitching Enchantress. The Tower of Fate has been unsealed and Shovel Knight vowed to figure what happened to his dear friend, no matter how many adversaries crossed his spade.

History

Shovel Knight is the inaugural title of Yacht Club Games, a collection of Way Forward Technologies employees who split from the company to go all in on this game. They started a Kickstarter Campaign to fund the project and it was backed three times over again. It was delayed for almost a year before its final release and it still has unimplimented features. There are three additional campaigns planned, with one released and two more on the way, and a battle mode in the works. All of these additional features will be free when they’re finished, I should note.

Shovel Knight draws a lot of inspiration on games from the past, Megaman especially.

Shovel Knight was planned for release in September 2013 but was actually released on June 26th, 2014. It’s competition was 1001 Spikes ( PC, Xbox 360, Xbox One, PS3, PS4, 3DS, WiiU, Goddam everything), Valiant Hearts: The Great War( PC, Xbox One, XBLA, PSN, PS4), and Oddworld New N’ Tasty (PS4).

Experiences

Shovel Knight is like a lost and hidden gem of an experience. I bought it, beat it,  beat it again, and then bought the soundtrack. This was one of those deep binges. I completed the whole thing in three days, I just couldn’t get enough. I cannot think of another 2-D platformer in which I was more emotionally invested in the story. I wanted so dearly to see what had become of Shield Knight, what united the Order, and what happened in the Tower of Fate.

Gameplay

The Kingdom serves as the overworld map for the game and it’s a akin to Super Mario Bros 3 in many ways. Shovel Knight travels across it to different towns filled with helpful NPCs and upgrades, treasure troves filled with sweet loot, and enemy strongholds filled with baddies and a Knight of the Order –oh yeah, they all contain fun as well.

Complete with ominous clouds to prevent you from seeing further than you’ve unlocked.

Shovel Knight’s control scheme is shockingly simple. He can jump, strike with his shovel, and bounce on enemies — different enemies offer varying levels of bounce. For such a little guy he can dish out and take shocking amounts of punishment — and he’s agile to boot. Don’t be too afraid of dying though. The only thing you lose is treasure and there’s always more of that to be had.

The shovel is both a weapon and a tool in the hands of a capable Shovel Knight. As such he can dig through earth and enemy alike. Secret treasures, relics, and music sheets lay hidden everywhere so keep your eyes peeled and give your shovel a swing at any suspicious piles of dirt of background.

The Gush

SHOVEL KNIGHT IS SHORT! I mean literally, he’s a short character, as in not tall. I can’t rightly say why but I really like that. The last character I remember playing who had difficult time reaching the highest kitchen shelf was Lil’ Mac from Punch Out. That’s some serious under-representation of shorter characters.

The music in this game takes the limitations of 16 bit sound and makes them shine. Jake Kaufman truly outdid himself with this memorable and bouncy soundtrack. It perfectly builds mood and atmosphere along with the beautiful art direction

The difficulty curve here is incredibly smooth and well calibrated. This game will challenge you, it will be tough but there’s never a situation or enemy that is unfair. Everything has a tactic or ability you can use to counter them, you’ve just gotta figure out what they are.

Except for these Green Fan jerks. They’re LITERALLY impossible to figure out.

The story is scarce but it provides a skeleton of sorts. The player-base can brew their theories but there isn’t a lot of definite proof/ are not a lot of outright answers. I mean this all in a good way though. We’ll imagine a story that suits

Each of the relics you can find provide a powerful and interesting new ability for our digging implement related hero. They acentuate his strengths or cover up his weaknesses and in any event they provide a playground of design.

Every so often random minibosses will appear on the overworld. Should you cross their paths then there will be a rumble. Each of these opponents provides a quick but challenging boss fight — and a little treasure to sweeten the deal. Many of these were also created by Kickstarter backers who fronted a lot of money for the project.

The Kvetch

When Shovel Knight gets hit he gets knocked back just a bit. This will lead to many deaths due to pits or spikes. But the thing that frustrates me about it is that Shovel Knight gets knocked back relative to what direction he is looking instead of which direction he was struck from. It’s unexpected to bump right when Shovel Knight gets hit with a projectile that was coming from the same direction simply because he’s walking away from it.

Take damage in a section like this is a near death sentence! Also, sweet flame rod.

Trying not to spoil things but Shield Knight is dangerously close to being a damsel in distress when that’s definitely not in her character. A few small tweaks and I think this game would be a little more woman friendly.

This one is really small but I wish there was a quicker way to access Shovel Knight’s relics. I can scroll through them with A and S but enemies are still moving during that time and it’s extremely stressful. The alternative is pausing and opening the relic menu and selecting what you need. It’s just a little too slow for my tastes.

The Verdict

Shovel Knight retails on Steam for $15 and I would say that pricing is perfect. If you were itching for an old-school platformer or you wanted to understand what your dad’s been railing on about all this time then Shovel Knight is a great place to start. Oh yeah, I did mention something about an expansion pack right? Well…

Next Week: Shovel Knight: Plague of Shadows

Armello (PC, Mac, Linux, iOS, Android, and PS4)

Armello is a kingdom composed of four major clans; Rabbit, Wolf, Bear, and Rat. Long ago they fought a grand, unending, war among one another but were united by the great and powerful Lion King. As of late however The King, a beacon of wisdom and justice, has lost his mind and begun to turn to dark magicks. You choose a hero from one of the clans and must dethrone the king by whatever means necessary –putting yourself on the throne wouldn’t hurt either–, Purge the land of this evil, become the heir apparent, kill the king with your own hands, or prove that you are truly the greater evil — why choose a lesser one?

History

Armello started off  in 2012 being developed by Team of Geeks, a 15 person team. It was originally going to be an iPad exclusive but Team of Geeks got a little stalled out. Development staggered forward for 2 years until they began a Kickstarter Campaign. Asking for $200,000 and getting $300,000 they made the game available for PS4 and computers.

The game’s influences include The Dark Crystal, Red Wall, Magic: The Gathering, and Spirited Away.

Armello was released on September 1st, 2015. It’s competition was Grow Home (PS4), Super Mario Maker (WiiU), and Undertale (PC and Mac)

Experiences

Big shout out to Youtuber Kikoskia, without whom I would have no knowledge of this game. Check him out, he makes good stuff. Before I go on I must announce that I have not actually played any PVP multiplayer. I can only speak to the vaguely competent AI. In my estimation games against other players would be totally different from a single play experience. I foresee the King dying and the players waking from their pvp smashing stupor to realize they were supposed to be playing the game instead of creating an endless cycle of revenge. My heart is filled with equal measure dread and zeal to play against another human.

“Are you guys even trying to kill me?”

Gameplay

The first thing you do when you begin a game of Armello is pick a character. Each character has unique statistics and a special ability, their clan also gives them an affinity for night or day — offering them bonuses during that time. Fight is how many dice you’ll role in a fight, body is your health, wits limits the number of cards you can carry and is used to avoid certain perils, and spirit is the amount of magic you get each night and is used in certain perils as well.

My favorite character is Barnaby because there’s something about a bunny in full plate that gives me the giggles.

What’s a peril? It’s a thing on the map that’ll mess you up if you fail to overcome it. What’s a card? Well it’s an item, spell, or trickery card that you can use, equip, cast, inflict on someone, or plop on a space and turn it into a peril. Cards also have a symbol on them corresponding to one of the faces on the armello dice — which are sword, sun, moon, shield, Wyld, and Rot. You can discard a card in combat or when faced with a peril to force one of the dice to roll that symbol. Barring that you can roll the dice and hope they fall favorably.

You also get to see who played the peril so if you know who’s at fault.

The resources in Armello are gold, magic, prestige, and rot. You gain gold from delving in dungeons and protecting settlements. Your magic equalizes at nightfall or can be boosted with certain items. Prestige is gained by defeating enemy heroes, saving towns, or killing monsters. It’s lost when you fall in combat, spend it on certain cards, kill a guard, or other special circumstances. Rot is acquired by playing certain cards, being killed by corrupted creatures, or failing certain perils — and rot is bad voodoo, just one point changes the way your character works and five points changes the game entirely.

The goal of Armello is to become the next monarch of Armello. You can do this by having the most prestige when the King dies, killing the king and surviving the encounter, gathering four spirit stones and bringing them to the king, or getting 5 rot and challenging the king to corruption mortal combat.

The Gush

When you have the most prestige you are prestige leader. Being prestige leader gives you the privilege of advising the king at the dawn of each day. He will present two options about how the kingdom should change and they’re almost always a choice of damnation. It’s a matter of choosing the lesser evil and some of the lesser evils are still very great. It’s a strategically satisfying mechanic.

Naturally, as prestige leader you cannot have the least prestige so… uuuuuh, guess we’re not fighting each other!

You can unlock certain items that can increase your stats for the duration of the game. Increasing weaker stats to balance out your character or making their powerful stats even more impressive. Even possibly granting new and interesting abilities altogether like regaining health at night or starting with 2 Prestige.

There’s something very satisfying about discovering effective strategies with each character. The first time I played Barnaby, The Screwloose Tinkerer, I stumbled upon a Blacksmith in my quests which made Barnaby’s weapons and armor even more effective. Now, whenever I’m presented with the opportunity to acquire the Blacksmith as Barnaby I do so.

The latest patch just put in a speed up function. Now during other players turns you can speed things up and skip their combat scenes. It makes everything run lightning fast when you’ve seen all the animations a hundred times — although watching the other turns was entertaining when I started playing.

The Kvetch

Achieving the rot victory is frustratingly difficult. I have yet to figure out how to get enough rot quickly enough to challenge the king before he keels over naturally. It might just take a lucky hand of opening cards and abilities but that would also be very unsatisfying. Maybe it’s just something that happens on accident?

At the end of the game each character is given some superlatives about how they played but… the game never explains what each superlative correlates to so I just gotta guess.

What the hell does being a warlock mean? Cause I didn’t cast a single spell. Or does that make me a purist?

I understand the flavor for each of the clans and it’s thematic and enjoyable. Wolf is all about fighting, rats are sneaky, bears are spiritual, but I have no idea what Rabbit’s deal is. Are they like the Hufflepuff of the clans? Doing that loyal and true thing? The closest thing I’ve got is that they’ve got a lot of ingenuity… I think… I dunno.

Sometimes I feel like the game’s go big or go home mentality makes the game too much about luck and too little about skill. Between card draws, dice rolls, Wonky AI, Guard placement and movement, monster movement and spawning, peril placement, and percentage chances of completing quests I sometimes feel victory goes to the luckiest.

It’s a 20% chance or nothing and there’s no way to improve my odds. If I win everyone will groan. If I lose I will be sad.

The Verdict

Armello is serious fun. It presents all the best parts of a board game without the worst parts of a board game. There’s no set up time, no putting away time, and no way to screw up how the rules work. The systems are very simple but also incredibly deep. Playing each character feels like a new experience. You might go for a certain path to victory but it’s much easier to win if you have an adaptive strategy adding even more to the replayability to the game. I’m not entirely sure if it’s worth the $20 price tag but it’s definitely worth $15 if you can catch it on Steam sale. Alone or buying it with a group of friends it’s incredibly fun.

Next Week: The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion

Middle Earth: Shadow of Mordor (PC, Linux, Mac, XBox One, XBox 360, PS3, PS4, and Select Toaster Ovens)

Barad-Dur wasn’t built in a day. Sauron’s rise to power was actually a slow crawl and Mordor was not always the blasted hellscape depicted in the novels or movies. No denizen of Middle-Earth would have called it lush but it was recovering from the battle between the Alliance of Men and Elves and the Orcs of Sauron. You play as Tallion, a Ranger posted in a settlement around The Black Gate, making sure that all is quiet in Mordor. But Sauron’s power is growing quietly in the dark places where men dare not look. The Black Gate is attacked by an army of orcs and the settlement is raze,  Tallion and his family are killed, and things generally go to hell. Made the vessel of an ancient wraith and restored to a mockery of life –by one of Sauron’s agents no less– Tallion now has the power to take revenge and fight Sauron’s orcs and destroy his generals. Meanwhile the wraith has forgotten who it was in life and must scour Mordor for pieces of his past.

History

Middle Earth: Shadow of Mordor was developed by Monolith Productions creators of the Condemned series and, one of my personal favorites, Septerra Core: Legacy of the Creator. Monolith wanted to create a game in which in-game death had consequences, non-player characters would respond to the player’s actions, and to create unique orcs that the player would recognize. This all eventually became the Nemesis System which truly makes the game stand out.

From a narrative standpoint, Monolith wanted to show what occurred in the gap between The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings, something that does not see much exposure in media.

Middle Earth: Shadow of Mordor was released on September 30th, 2014. It’s competition was Hyrule Warriors (WiiU), Stronghold Crusader II (PC), and Borderlands: The Pre-sequel (PC, PS3, XBox 360).

Experiences

I was always a pretty big fantasy nerd and in Elementary School my father suggested that I read the Hobbit. I was probably a little too young for it, I had a hard time visualizing the characters and events but I did understand the story. Even though I was a little in the dark I knew that I wanted more Middle-Earth. It was a good time for a blossoming Lord of the Rings fan, Peter Jackson was making his movies, new editions of the books were hitting store shelves, and even non-nerds were getting excited about it. There have been LoTR games being made since the days of the Commodore 64 and it took a long time for designers to really get things right. Shadow of Mordor is definitely a step in the right direction.

This is no fabrication. Shadows of Mordor was the name of the C 64 text adventure Lord of the Rings game. Everything old is new again.

Gameplay

As a Gondorian ranger Tallion is a master of stealth, blade, and bow. Fortified by the power of the wraith he’s  a true force to be reckoned with. Possessing powers of ghost vision, insight into hearts of his enemies (the ability to see their strengths and weaknesses), summoning a ghost bow, control the minds of lesser beings — I ask myself frequently why Sauron thought it was a good idea to put a ghost in Tallion’s head– , and allowing him to endure death. But should Tallion die the orc that killed him will be celebrated as a great fighter and promoted to a command position. Tallion’s Ranger training will be put to the test now that it’s him vs. the legions of Sauron.

I mean lesser in terms of brain power, not size :D.

Most of the game takes place around the Sea of Nurn and the Black Gate. Here orcs go about their business, enslaving local humans, trying to kill each other, having grog drinking contests, trying to kill you, and marshaling their forces for the coming war. The game is mostly about interrupting these activities and delaying the war machine by whatever means are available to you. Orcs having a grog contest? Poison the grog and see what happens. Free local slaves and they’ll feed you information about the commanders and even assist you in battle when they can.

And there are a lot of commanders to mow through.

The Gush

The Nemesis System is the big pull for the game, it shows, and it paid off. Every commander has strengths, weakness, abilities, a primary concern, and personality. Some of these traits can create an enemy that is truly difficult to face except under special circumstances. On top of all this, you can fight Commanders that have defeated your friends for bragging rights. They’re not all just mindless mooks, there are some who stand out and will kick your ass. Hunting these guys isn’t just a task, it’s a genuine pleasure.

The game rewards you with extra experience for using the commander’s weakness. INCENTIVE!

It’s something quite small but whenever Tallion encounters an orc commander the soundtrack fades away and is instead replaced with what sounds like every orc in all of Mordor chanting the commander’s name. It really pumps you up to fight this guy and simultaneously let’s you know that this guy is serious business and will murder your face. The chant resumes when Tallion is about to be killed by a commander, just so you remember the name of the bastard who killed you should you fall.

This might be the best Assassin’s Creed game that I’ve ever played. You’ve probably heard it a million times before but it bears repeating that this game is basically the free running and faffing about mechanics that are integral to the Assassin experience… but with orcs. And as the ancient Gygaxian philosophers once said Orcs are greater than Templar or something.

The Kvetch

Shadow of Mordor feels like Christmas morning in which your Father got you Legos, your mother got you tinker toys, your grandfather got you Lincoln Logs, and your Aunt got you megablocks. Each on their own is amazing and incredibly fun to play with but even though you could play with them together they don’t exactly fit. They don’t have the cohesion that they could. You can control these orcs and pit them against each other but there’s no end to that means. You have to do it for a few story missions but there’s nothing you can really do with it in the normal game.

Sometimes when you kill a commander they return with a chunk of metal holding them together. I named one of these guys Chucklenuts because all he would do was laugh when we clashed. The first time he came back I was almost honored and pleased to see Chucklenuts, so glad was I the opportunity to kill him twice. It started to get really old around the fourth time.

Yeah, he’ll just walk that off.

I gotta put my canon scrutinizing glasses as far up my nose as I can and complain about the Uruk-Hai. Orcs have been around in Middle-Earth ever since Elves got twisted and deformed. The Uruk-Hai are basically super orcs created by the wizard Saruman in order to better conquer Middle-Earth. They’re more bigger, stronger, and more disciplined — good on you Saruman… buuuuuuuuuut I’m pretty sure that at this part in the canon of Middle-Earth that the Uruk-Hai hadn’t be created yet. It’s a pretty minor quibble but I am curious why the decision was made.

I’m very curious why the game omits the Wargs and Trolls, replacing them with Caragors and Graugs respectively. I’m genuinely curious if these are canon creatures or if Monolith couldn’t get the rights to the original creatures or something.

Oh yeah… I still don’t know why Sauron put a wraith in Tallion. I dunno, maybe his agent did it on their own but… then… why did Sauron’s minion do it? I’m so confused.

The Verdict

Middle Earth: Shadow of Mordor goes for $49.99 on Steam, and I don’t mean to downplay the game because it’s very fun and enjoyable, but I just don’t think it lives up to its price tag. If you’re a fan of Middle Earth and have a strong desire to kill some orcs and get some revenge then I’d recommend picking up this title on sale for $30.

Next Week: Max Payne 2

Binding of Issac: Rebirth, Is It Worth it? (PS4, PSVita, Mac, Linux, and PC)

Back in my Binding of Isaac Review I mentioned that a remake had been released under the name of Binding of Isaac: Rebirth and that it was more expensive and was pretty cool. It’s difficult to review Rebirth because it’s basically the same game as the original… and if that’s the case then what’s the purpose of making or purchasing a remake?

This is not a review of Rebirth. As it’s very similar to the Binding of Isaac Classic so if you wanna know what I think about Roguelike shooters check out that review. The question is, if you bought Binding of Isaac Classic is it even worth it to buy Rebirth? Is a Binding of Isaac remake worth $15?

History

Rebirth was developed by Nicalis with Edmund McMillen at the helm of design. Nicalis is a company that focuses on developing smaller indie titles and their record reads like Indie Gaming’s Greatest Hits with games like Cave Story and 1001 Spikes under their belt. McMillen’s desire to remake the game stemmed from his large dislike of having made the game in Flash. By the time he was done with the original there was no room to add more content and it was riddled with small glitches that seemed impossible to fix.

Binding of Isaac: Rebirth was released on November 4th, 2014. It’s competition was Five Nights at Freddies 2 (PC), This War of Mine (PC), and Assassin’s Creed Unity (PC, PS4, and XBox One).

Experiences

To say that Binding of Isaac is big in my friend group is an understatement. We play it while we all voice-chat, in local multiplayer, and talk about our luckiest and unluckiest runs. Further, I feel like the slacker of the bunch. I’m basically the only one of them not to unlock Platinum God and all of the content. I’ve nearly doubled the time I played Binding of Isaac classic in the hours I’ve put into Rebirth and there’s still more things for me to unlock and do.

Why It’s Worth the Cost

150 new items. From silly odd things like Tiny Planet — which will make you the center of attention or at least your attacks– to even a new Guppy item, Guppy’s Collar, and the immensely powerful Sacred Heart. There are so many new toys to play with.

Guppy’s Collar, now available at a Devil Deal near you.

It’s no longer on Flash so it will be easier to add more content in the future, paving the way for whatever new idea pops into McMillen’s head.

You can now donate extra money to shops in order to improve their item pool and increase the number of items they sell.

It’s easier to collect, and therefore find, accurate data about exactly how different items effect Isaac. Evil, luck, and faith are all now documentable statistics and the tooltips are more clear for items overall.

Items can now synergize. Transforming their powers into one incredibly powerful effect.

Brimstone lasers + Tammy’s head creates a wave of destruction impossible in Classic.

Some problematic items that are generally accepted as bad have been improved and buffed, making them viable again — Ipecac will no longer fly over the heads of your enemies and lemon mishap… is slightly better.

Even more new characters such as, the undying Lazarus, the enigmatic Eden, and the sinister Azazel.

New smaller pickups like runes which generate bizarre card-like effects and batteries to recharge your chargeable items.

New bosses, enemies, champion types, and challenges. Some of which unlock even more new items.

20 Challenges in the base game and Afterbirth adds 10 more.

If you quit the game you can now take up from where you left off– or abandon a godawful run.

New areas like The Dark Room which lies beyond Sheol. And the Boss Rush which can only be accessed after defeating Mom in under 20 minutes — gotta go speed!

New 16-bit art style.

Better code so things are less likely to go totally ham and less crashing — this also means fewer I am Error rooms but it’s a small price to pay.

Level seeds! Every run has an 8 digit seed which can be input to repeat the run. You can’t get achievements from seeded runs but now you can challenge a friend, or rival,  to see if they could do better in terms of time or effectiveness with your exact circumstances.

And more things than I can even fit in my brain space.

Such as crawl-spaces hidden under rocks, leading to special hidden areas.

Reasons Against

There are a lot of things to relearn and some of your tricks from the Classic game might betray you now. Some old items don’t even work the same way any more.

All of the old music has been scrapped so all of those tunes you loved so much can only be heard in Binding of Isaac Classic.

I haven’t been able to get Afterbirth to run on my Vista Laptop. I’ve tried every fix and it just won’t work.

There’s no transferring your save so you’ll have to unlock everything you unlocked from Classic all over again.

Some bug-fixes have actually made things more difficult. Cain’s lucky foot no longer guarantees good pills and and you can no longer have an infinite number of soul hearts.

AFTERBIRTH!

Heads up! Rebirth has its own expansion already, goes by the name of Afterbirth and sells for $11. The same caveat that goes for Wrath of the Lamb goes for Afterbirth, Afterbirth spikes the difficulty up quite a bit. Afterbirth brings even more characters such as Lillith– forever accompanied by her faithful Incubus– and The Keeper — for whom greed is certainly good. Afterbirth also comes with new challenges and even more new items and synergies. Afterbirth brings the Spelunky daily run to the Binding of Isaac experience.. There’s even a new mode of play, Greed Mode — it’s like a normal run but way quicker, contained, and fueled by sweet sweet money.

Behold the might and wrath of Ultra Greed.

That being said, it’s not all sunshine and rainbows. Azazel got a bunch of nerfs that people are still a little miffed about. And the difficulty spike might be too much for some.

The Verdict

I’m totally for it — I bought it after all. But I hope that these pros and cons can help you reach an informed decision. This is what Afterbirth is bringing to the basement — and taking away in some cases. I welcome these changes because I think they create a more fun game experience overall so I would say that Rebirth and Afterbirth are both sound gaming purchases.

Next Week: Cthulhu Saves the World

Word Realms (PC, Mac, and Linux)

In a world where words can hurt — like not just emotionally but on an extremely physical level– you wake up with an awful hangover — which is to say that you’re a native to this world, you haven’t used the power of booze to astrally teleport or something. The people of the valley you’re now in are being plagued by the evil Lord Nightmare who is, unsurprisingly, making it really difficult for people to sleep. Will you take up the cause of the local villagers, vanquishing monsters until you rush up to Nightmare’s Keep to deck him in the schnoz? Or will you just do all this junk because it means you can leave the valley and move on. You decide! Spell, use items, craft things, and solve puzzles in an adventure for all time!

History

Word Realms was the second game made by Asymmetric Publications and designed by Zack “Jick” Johnson and Kevin Simmons. It’s creation was funded through Kickstarter exceeding it’s asking price, $100,000, by a narrow margin. Johnson and Simmons had been discussing the idea of the game for months on the Kingdom of Loathing Podcast and working on it on and off before the campaign started. The Kickstarter ended on June 21st, 2012 and the game was released on May 21st, 2013. It’s competition was Fez (PC), Monaco: What’s yours is Mine (XBox Live Indie Arcade), and Resident Evil: Revelations (PC, PS3, XBox 360, and WiiU).

Experiences

I’ll just say this, my grandmother is better than me at this game. I bought it for her as a Christmas present because I knew she liked Scrabble so I figured she’d have fun with this. Little did I know that she would blow me out of the water. She breezed through the game and even thought it was a little on the easy side. I’ve been playing games for decades and I felt so upset but… why? What kind of petty jerk feels bad because his grandma is better at a game than him? — the pettiest of jerks, that’s who. So, I recognize my grammie as the resident Scrabble queen, long be her reign.

Gameplay

Word Realms is a lot like Scrabble, except your words score is the damage that your attack will do and that your rounds have a strict time limit. Monsters fight in a similar fashion and have their own abilities to amp up the difficulty, like copying your word, skipping your turn, or reducing the round time. You’ve also got abilities of your own including the power to wear clothes that boost your stats, use potions and scrolls, and use skills of your own. Your skills are based on your class, either wizard or warrior. Warriors play pretty simply but effectively, they’ll brute force their way through the game. Wizards on the other hand are more difficult but have more potential and can do bizzarre things — like wizards do.

Fight a ghost, get some loot, spell some words, feel good about your vocabulary.

The Gush

There’s so much to do beside the main quest. After you defeat Lord Nightmare you unlock Endless mode and get to face new and unique monsters. There’s also a secret underground fighting ring hidden somewhere in the game and it’s filled with a series of optional fights that confer powerful equipment and skills. Happy hunting.

If you’re really hardcore there are a few secret endings that are really difficult to unlock. No spoilers but reaching them will test yours skills.

Every word has a taunt based on its word type and it’s meaning. Fiery words, for example, get special dialogue and some words get totally unique taunts . So you might find a little joke if you experiment with your word choice.

With such classics as…

The Kvetch

There is a song for the main map and a few songs for combat. Ope, wait, there’s a song for the intro menu too. And the main menu music is the only music I can really tolerate. It’s all fine but it gets on my nerves real quickly.

I had to brute force some of the puzzles, attempting them again and again until there was a favorable set of starting circumstances. What really kills me is that only a few of these are mandatory and that those were the ones I got stuck on the most.

Not to say that the puzzles aren’t interesting, just that they were unfun levels of hard for me.

The crafting system seemed really interesting. I was stoked to discover all of these recipes and make some incredibly awesome stuff but I found it overall confusing. It took me a while to realize that one things could get crafted into another, as in, you don’t have to craft two things together. You can instead put one thing in the menu alter it to another craftable. The things I DID create weren’t stellar or even very useful for my strategies.

Look at all this stuff! Which of it goes together? I dunno, man.

The Verdict

If you like Scrabble or other word games then I think an $11 price tag is more than fair. If you’re not a big fan of word games then you’re probably not gonna like this one. It’s well made, humorous, and beautifully priced so if you want some puzzles in your Boggle then pick up a copy.

If you were totally sold on this game then pick up a copy here. http://www.wordrealms.com/

Next Week: Seven Kingdoms II: The Fryhtan Wars.

Kingdom of Loathing (PC and portable devices.)

The Kingdom of Loathing is not your typical fantasy RPG setting. It does not have mere clerics, wizards, and fighting men — I shit you not, 1st edition DnD had the Fighting Man class. It’s instead populated by Turtle Tamers, Pastamancers, and Accordion Thieves. These disparate adventurers have united because King Ralph XI — in the long line of Ralph — has been kidnapped by the Naughty Sorceress. For what purpose, no one can say but it cannot be a noble one because she’s seriously naughty, like so naughty. The Council of Loathing — in a clear bid to rescue their king — must first give you 11 quests before the Council runs out of ideas… I MEAN you are ready to face her naughtiness. Solve puzzles, fight monsters, and become an adventurer in the Kingdom of Loathing.

Behold the Kingdom in all of it’s glory.

History

Kingdom of Loathing begins with one man, Zack “Jick” Johnson and begins with high silliness. Working as a programmer, Johnson made a few games that he never released, thinking that they were too serious. He decided that he’d work on something for a week and then release whatever he had completed. The art was drawn by hand, and all of the initial content was stream of consciousness ideas where nothing but the worst ideas were discarded — I mean, meat became the currency of the realm so just imagine what the bad ideas were.  A year later KOL had 300,000 player accounts. Johnson invited his child-hood friend Josh “Mr. Skullhead” Nite to help him write and design the game.

It grew and evolved as Johnson and Nite added more content on an, albeit, irregular schedule. The game started by running off of donations and eventually Johnson began rewarding donations with in game items releasing and retiring an item every month. In 2005 he and Nite quit their day jobs and started working on the game full time. In 2007 Johnson hired two members of the player-base to help him work on the game, offering their experience as players to design new content. In November of 2014 Nite was laid off from the development team.

Kingdom of Loathing was released in it’s earliest form in 2003 and content has been steadily added and trimmed to this day. It’s current form is known as NS13 which released on June 15th 2007. It’s competition in 2003 was Dark Cloud 2 (PS2), Galactic Civilizations (PC), and Aquaman: Battle for Atlantis (Xbox).

Experiences

I’ve been playing this game for seven years and I still have more to do. There are still enemies I haven’t fought yet, still items I don’t have, and quests I haven’t completed. I run about 300 turns a day in under an hour thanks to the miracles of scripting and assistance tools like KOL mafia. I’m the leader of a clan and still ascend when the latest challenge path rolls out. I make enough meat to purchase the item of the month. And I love this game. The content is always fresh, funny, and has something for a player of every variety.

KOL Mafia: For when you’ve played the game so much that you have the game play itself

Gameplay

KOL is a single player MMO with turn based combat. Single Player MMO might sound like an oxy-moron but in this case it’s just a bizarre descriptor. The community is large and very present in the player economy, a silly PVP, and the ever present chat but when it comes to your character and your adventures you’ll mostly be flying solo. That being said, you can buff other players and throw bricks at them — you know, your choice.

The major mechanic of the game is the turn limit. The player is limited to how many turns per day they can adventure. The player is provided with 40 turns per day and when the player is out of turns well, there’s always the chat to play around with. You can get more turns by eating foodstuff and drinking boozestuff but not all food and booze is created equal. The better the food and drink, the more adventures and experience points it confers. Don’t drink too much though, or you’ll be too falling down drunk to do anything.

Break barrels, hang out in chat, it’s all in a day’s play.

The three main stats of the game are muscle, moxie, and mysticality. Muscle gives you more health, a greater chance to hit, and more damage with melee weapons. Moxie makes you take less damage, harder to hit, and a better chance to hit with ranged weapons. Mysticality gives increased MP (Muscle, Mojo, or Mana points respectively) and greater spell damage. Each class has a primary stat, a secondary stat, and a tertiary stat. Muscle classes hit really hard, soak all the damage, and can dish out more damage with sweet skills. Moxie classes don’t hit very hard, don’t take much damage, and can do weird things with their sweet skills. Mysticality classes might get beaten up in one hit but can generally defeat enemies with a single spell — they also have other sweet skills to facilitate their spellslinging. It’s not all about how thoroughly you can pummel monsters though. This game will also require the player to solve fiendish puzzles — the less mandatory they are the more fiendish they will be.

After the player defeats the Naughty Sorceress the game only opens up further. Between clan dungeons, The Sea, collecting bounties, and ascending there’s still more game to play. Ascension is the real big mechanic of the game. As a player you’re not tied down to your class. After you defeat the Sorceress you can begin the game anew with a new class and one of your old skills. In addition to the standard game there are challenge paths that alter the way the game is played allowing you to play a specific character — like the Avatar of Sneaky Pete, the most moxious man in the lands — or just altering the rules of the game — like in Bees hate you where you cannot use items with the letter B in them.

The Gush

I mentioned Clan dungeons before and I’ve got to bring them up again because they’re just about my favorite thing in the game. A Clan is like a guild in other MMOs and there are certain dungeons that you can pay to open for the opportunity to fight unique monsters and acquire immense and powerful loot. Team up with your Clan-mates and delve into the mysterious stronghold of Hobopolis, for example, and fight all manner of migrant laborer as you work your way towards Hodgman, the Hoboverlord. To what lengths will you go to acquire Roger, his Imaginary Hamster? Will you acquire it for the power it confers or the prestige it offers.

It’s town square holds 3000 hobos between you and your goal, not to mention the offshoot neighborhoods.

If the humor in this game doesn’t keep you playing then the systems just might. The game seems simple — the seal clubber was designed to play through the game doing nothing but attacking monsters — but the systems can get really complex. You can banish unwanted monsters from certain areas or use an item that allows you to run away from combat without spending a turn. It might be hard to believe but people have figured out how to finish their runs in under 800 turns.

My personal favorite part of the game is probably the player economy. Most of my time spent these days is on the mall pricing screen and in the trade chat channel. I buy, sell, trade, and sell my services to the highest bidder. In game currency also retains its value because you can spend in game currency on out of game currency. A Mr. Accessory runs about 23 million meat and I can make that in a month meaning that as long as someone is willing to sell, I am able to buy. Premium content can also be purchased from the mall for a modest — and sometimes exorbitant fee — so if you save your sirloin you can acquire these limited items.

Speaking of Premium Content, the microtransactions of this game are actually really player friendly. Because it’s single player you don’t need them to compete, some of the strongest items can be acquired without paying a cent. For the low price of 10 dollars per thing, it’s pretty cheap. And, as I said before, you can spend in game meat on these premium items.

Some of the premium content aren’t even items, some of them are new areas to explore.

The Kvetch

The game’s depth can be confusing and even intimidating at times. I often need to have strategies of high level play and intense speed runs explained to me in chat and I’ve been playing for a good long while. Jick and co keep adding simple ways to complete quests, but speed runners retain their strategies. It used to be back in the day that a new and casual player would NEED to use the wiki to make headway in the quest line. That’s not so much these days but it can still seem daunting at first glance.

The game may have deep systems but they’re all based on the simple concept of numbers getting bigger. If it doesn’t excite you for numbers to get bigger then it might be really difficult to get into the game. Numbers get bigger, you kill skeletons, you get some sweet swords.

The Verdict

There’s so much more to this game that I didn’t have time to mention. World events will sweep across the Kingdom and change everything for a few days, the game also celebrates out of game holidays. I really like this game and the best part is that it’s completely free. It’s silly and goofy and yet has incredibly deep systems at its core. If you’ve got the time and feel like some goofiness then give it a whirl.

Play it for Free at www.kingdomofloathing.com

Next Week: Word Realms