One Piece Mansion (PS1)

Introduction

Polpo– the guy in red up there– owns an apartment building. He’s doing pretty well for himself. His rival, Chocola, has kidnapped his sister– because this is a videogame and women exist to be kidnapped and push the male hero forward. If Polpo does not complete Chocola’s challenges then he’ll never see his sister again! These challenges revolve around, strangely enough, making Polpo’s mansion better suited for his tenants– These are the worst kidnapping demands that I’ve ever heard of.

This is basically how much plot we get but I want to know more about this world. What are those buildings?

History

It’s hard to believe that Capcom made something so weird. It’s stranger yet that this game got released to the American market because it is incredibly bizarre. Hideaki Itsuno was the director on the project and he also directed Power Stone (an arena fighting game) and some of the Devil May Cry games– which do not follow the strangeness of this game. It wasn’t his first rodeo and it was released around the middle of the Playstation’s life-span.

One Piece Mansion was released on September 30th, 2001. It’s competition was Silent Hill 2 (PS2), Ico (PS2), and Devil May Cry (PS2). I see a lot of PS2 titles and I’m seeing that backwards compatability was working out really well for Sony.

Nostalgia

I saw this game in Playstation Magazine, a great publication to have by the way– I can’t tell you how many things I wouldn’t have found if not for it– and I imagined something totally different than what the advertisement for it presented. I don’t know what I expected exactly but I imagine it had something to do with helping tenants and exploring this mansion. Not the case. Thanks 00s games industry.

Gameplay

Just look at that. Look at that up there. Does that make any sense? It’s a little overwhelming but let me assure you, that all make sense. Each of those characters in a yellow bordered room is a tenant. They pay you rent every month. Each of them inflicts or relieves stress in different adjacent rooms. That sumo wrestler– trust me, he’s a sumo wrestler– on the left center slams the walls, floors, and ceilings to practice. You can imagine that that racket pisses off his neighbors, hence their stress increase.

Those bastards in the upper left with the black bordered rooms are part of the Syndicate 5. They’re here to rob your tenants, light the place on fire, piss them off, or blow up their homes– which is your property. For some ungodly reason there’s no police force to get these guys off your property so you’ll have to scare them when they’re robbing people. Positiion those letters well, they’ll help you or get in your way when it comes to stopping criminals. The only way to get them to leave for good is to use that stress your tenants are inflicting and put them right near these chumps. After about 1600 sumo slams they’ll bugger off.

This game is all about managing the stress of your tenants so you’ll have to position, evict, and bring in tenants that fit your tenant’s stress needs. Elevators, rooms, swapping, all cost you money so it’s all a matter of managing resources. By the way, when a tenant gets too stressed out THEIR ROOM EXPLODES so don’t let that happen.

The Gush

I love the designs of these characters. They have really unique and interesting animations that I love to watch. If you zoom in then you can even hear what they’re saying and thinking. It’s really interesting and fun.

From right to left, Ai-Chan (The happy MPDG), The Lovers, Heebee (The bamboo artist), and some unknown creature that looks like it’s gonna eat my tenants.

Each level in the game has a unique character that appears at a random time. They can either be really beneficial or really destructive. The only one I ever saw was a spoon-bending psychic with a long scarf who would rain lightning down on the mansion. Even though it was destructive I thought it was so cool.

I don’t know how but Polpo himself is immune to the stress caused by his tenants. Putting him in the middle of a stress nexus is totally fine. He’ll never flip– I wonder what his secret is.

The Kvetch

So you’re mansion is going well, everyone’s got a nominal level of stress, sometimes you have to swap a few tenants around to keep everything good. THEN, out of nowhere a member of Syndicate 5 can show up– blowing up one of the previous tenant’s rooms (at no cost to you but still)– and start causing a ruckus. At that point you’ve got to move all the tenants around to get that prick to leave. I know they’re goal is to make the game difficult but it’s really punitive when they blow up the stress lynch pin. I think it would be much better if they took up empty rooms or dropped in from above.

There are only 2 tracks of music for the game. One when everything is relaxed, and another when you’re on the verge of bankruptcy that’s really repetitive and frantic. It gets really boring really fast listening to these same tracks over and over again.

The Verdict

Nostalgia can’t save this game for me. I just don’t see what the purpose or payoff for the game is besides a high score. I’d say that it’s worth a look at but buy a copy of it and share it with your friends. Actually, the most fun I’ve had with the game is inflicting it on my friends so let that frame the game.

Next Week: Dawn of War: Soulstorm

Megaman Legends 1 (PS1)

Introduction

On a world covered in endless water Mega Man will take its jump to the third dimension– with awesome opening narration. This incarnation of the blue bomber is an explorer who uses his family’s flying machine to search the seas for ruins and treasure. He travels the skies and ruins as the adopted son of Barrel Casket and, his granddaughter, Roll Casket. Their flying machine is called The Flutter and she’s seen some better times. This latest expedition will lead Megaman to an adventure greater than he could have expected. Run, jump, shoot, and discover the secrets of an Island.

This island to be precise.

 

History

Keiji Inafune created Megaman back in 1987 and ten years later he would produce, and help design, Megaman Legends. Inafune and his team wanted to make a game that was just fun for the players. Unfortunately, Legend’s quality suffered because it was released before it had gotten the polish Inafune wanted to give it. Inafune said, “If we made it at the present time in modern quality, I believe that it would have sold a lot better,” on the matter of its early release. Inafune went as far as saying, “[My favorite game is] Mega Man Legends, a title that really didn’t sell well in the Mega Man franchise,” in 2007 at Comic Con.

Megaman Legends was also released on the Nintendo 64 and the PC in increasingly bad ports. Each one receiving a lower score from reviewers than the Playstation release.

Fun Fact: In the Japanese release Megaman’s name is Rock, like all of his Japanese counterparts– I’ve got to say Rock is just a more sensible first name than Megaman. If you were at a coffee shop and you started a conversation with someone and when you left you asked his name and he said, ‘My name is Megaman,’ I think we’d all give him an odd look and never call him back.

Megaman Legends was released in the US on August 31st 1998. It’s competition was Medieval (PS), Spyro the Dragon (PS), and Metal Gear Solid (PS)– no wonder this title got blown out of the water.

Nostalgia

This was the first Megaman release for the Playstation and it came as a big surprise for me. I was familiar with the Megaman games from my Super Nintendo days so I thought that Megaman would be a Nintendo property until the day I died but it was the first game in my life that not only jumped platforms but also jumped into the 3rd dimension. At first I didn’t like it, I kept wondering where Dr. Wily was, but eventually I warmed up to the game. I realized that it was a different take on the Blue Bomber. A take that included things like a plot, a story, and interesting characters. Not to say that there’s anything wrong with the jumping and shooting that the previous incarnations bring, it’s just that this game is a different beast.

What is this 3-d world? And why doesn’t it look totally awful?

Gameplay

Even though this game was strong RPG elements it’s still a Megaman game and is therefore all about jumping and shooting robots. And boy are there robots to shoot and lots of weapons to shoot them with. Like Megaman games before it Legends presents quite an arsenal for the Blue Bomber. Unlike other Megaman games he doesn’t get more weapons from defeating bosses in this game he can find stuff in the ruins he explores. His partner, Roll, can take these seemingly dissimilar junk parts and make sweet special weapons from them. Megaman’s buster can also be upgraded with buster parts that can make it shoot further or do more damage among other things. So check everywhere for stuff, you never know when a hole in the wall might contain valuable stuff.

As far as the story goes, not soon after Megaman lands on the island it gets attacked by a gang of pirates called the Bonnes who are searching for treasure that is rumored to be hidden somewhere on the island. Since the police force isn’t really trained to repel pirate attacks it falls to Megaman to fend off the sky-borne ne’er-do-wells– Yarrr.

From left to right we have Bon, Tron, and Tiesel.

When Megaman isn’t fighting pirates or trying out his new weapons he’ll probably be exploring ruins and solving some pretty easy puzzles. The ruins are interesting just to look at. Most of them look different and I always wondered, “who made these places and why?”

 

The Gush

I love the Bonnes. They’re dangerous but still comic relief. Unlike the other villains of the game, they’re human. So they have human flaws and have human problems. Watching Tiesel lose his patience and throw a little tantrum is hilarious. But Trons creations present decent challenges. Their flying machine is called the Gesselschaft which is German for society and is often extrapolated as a sociological term which are things people do for their own benefit. I didn’t get that for years down the line but it did make sense why pirates would call their home base a term for doing things for personal gain.

Such as Bruno, the walking weapons platform. Literally every part of this guy has weapons on it except his torso and his head.

Or the Fokkerwolf which presents a highly mobile and powerful opponent even if it is a little fragile.

And how could I mention this game without talking about the Servbots, Tron’s faithful and indestructible minions.

Each one has their own unique personality and they’re just so cute.

 

All of the characters are actually really interesting. From Gramp’s mechanical parts, the plights of the city’s mayor, and the machinations of the local “gang” there’s always someone new to meet with near Earthbound levels of humorous dialogue. Also some characters can initiate little mini-quests and puzzles to earn buster parts, items that can be developed into sub weapons, or money.

The sub-weapons in this game range from simple to intense. There’s the Machine Gun Arm that does what you’d expect, fire a lot of shots. Then there’s the Shining Laser which can pierce enemies hitting multiples at once for massive damage! All of them have upgradeable attributes so I recommend toying around with them and seeing which ones suit your playstyle.

The Bonnes aren’t the only ones making robots of mass destruction. The underground ruins are swarming with and defended by reaverbots. Some of these reaverbots dwarf Megaman, but that’s never stopped him before. The boss fights in this game are almost always a joy.

We got big reaverbots!

Fast reaverbots!

And annoying reaverbots with unbreakable shields!

The plot and mystery of the game is marvelous. It’s a great tale about what it means to dig too deep and dealing with the consequences of it. It answers a few questions about this water covered world but asks just as many more, striking a nice balance between mystery and resolution.

The music in this game is really good. It fills me with fear when something intense is happening or perfectly compliments the dank ruins of the underground.

The Kvetch

Some sub-weapon upgrades are just plain too expensive. Most of them are for giving the weapon unlimited ammo but 99990 is just too much zenny to reasonably farm for anything. The best enemies in the game only drop 2000 per so I’d have to destroy 50 of them, going in and out of the room repeatedly. And that’s just for the final stage of the upgrade and not including any of the other stats.

New Game plus allows a player to start the game over but there’s no real benefit to doing so. They can change the difficulty to hard on the second playthrough and then easy on the third, each one increasing money drops. But there’s no carry over between the playthroughs so I don’t really see the point.

Although the plot does answer some questions it answers almost none about who Megaman is. I posits that there’s something unique about Megaman even though this world has other Megamen but doesn’t elaborate on it overmuch. I guess that’s what sequels are for.

The camera is not always your friend in this game. It sometimes does what is pleases and leads to the player getting blindsided by enemies they couldn’t have seen coming.

Locking on in this game is nearly a waste of your time. The player can’t move and lock on at the same time. It suddenly gives a character like Megaman, the original jumper and shooter, the decision to choose one. Shots generally tend toward your opponents even when you’re not locked on but the fight against the agile Fokkerwolf are exasperated because it’s really hard to hit. This problem also gets highlighted when enemies on the ceiling are throwing bombs all over the place. In these situations the camera pans up and makes it impossible to see the explosives below as they bounce around. It’s problematic overall.

The Verdict

Those complaints are little niggles trying to chip away at a rock solid game. Kattleox is fun to explore, the characters are fun to see, and the enemies are fun to fight. Overall I think this game is super good… but… I have to admit that I’m pretty nostalgia blind for it. It was one of my first Playstation games and I played the heck out of it because I might have forced myself to get into it because I didn’t have anything else to play– like a videogame version of Stockholme Syndrome. So maybe make a friend who’s into Megaman already buy it first and try it?

Next Week: Megaman Legends 2– Electric Boogaloo.

Diablo (PS1, PC)

 

 

 

Introduction

One of the Demonic Prime-evils, Diablo, has escaped from his prison in the small town of Tristram. With the assistance of the Arch-Bishop, Lazarus, he has driven the King to madness and possessed the King’s son, Albrecht. The player takes the role of a powerful Warrior, a quick Rogue, or a brilliant Sorceror and must fight through a dungeon of Hell-spawned monsters in order to destroy the great Demon.

Disclaimer: My experience with this game is mostly in the PS1 port. I’ll offer points about both versions but most of my experience is still with that port.

Development

Diablo was made by Blizzard Entertainment, it’s difficult to imagine that Diablo was only the 6th game they had made– It’s also surreal to think that they made The Lost Vikings and Blackthorne. They were most well known for making Warcraft at the time, a real time strategy game, so making an adventure game like Diablo was risky.

This is where it all started kids. This is the beginning of Blizzard.

 

Diablo has multiple versions, it has the PS1 port and an expansion called Hellfire. I played most of my Diablo hours on the PS1 port so I’m going to be talking about it a lot, especially in the Kvetch section. The Hellfire expansion was developed, not by Blizzard, but by Sierra. It adds a new class, the Monk. And includes a strangely large amount of cut content, namely the Bard and the Barbarian. It also adds the NPCs Lester and Celia that interact with a new area in Tristram, The Hive. 

The Hive also has special interactions with the joke character, The Complete Nut.

 

Apparently there’s a lot of cut dialogue and cut quests that never made it into the game. As it stands the number of quests are quite limited. Most of these quests are only available in single player mode. I think they were cut because Blizzard figured most players would be playing online.

There’s an entirely cut NPC from the original game, Tremain the Priest. Cain takes his place, more or less.

 

Diablo was released on December 31st, 1996. It released at the same time as Donkey Kong Country 3 (SNES), The Neverhood (PC)

 

Nostalgia

I used to play the demo for this game on my Uncle’s computer and it scared the piss out of me. I’ve mentioned that I was a coward when I was a kid but I couldn’t even bring myself to fight basic enemies I was so scared. I could deal with skeletons and little demons but when I got to fighting the weird bug things on the early floors I would flip out and run. I would think, “If I find those things then I’m just going to have to restart the game until they’re not an enemy there”. I remember the first time I fought the Butcher, I just ran. I opened that door, heard his dialogue, and closed the game as quickly as I could. It’s really interesting not being scared of it anymore. Now I’m more than willing to charge head long into the Skeleton King’s rib cage and smash it to pieces.

That’s the Butcher on the right there. His chamber is far more frightening than he is.

 

Gameplay

Diablo is a hack and slash dungeon crawl. No matter which class you choose your goal is to venture further into the labyrinth, level up, find better gear, and fight stronger monsters. Unlike Diablo 2, character’s don’t acquire more skills as they level up. Leveling up only increases their attributes. Attribute levels must be at a certain level to wear certain items or use scrolls and spell books. Limited inventory space means choosing which items are the most valuable and bringing them back up to town to sell. Certain NPCs in town will offer single players quests which can net them impressive items that can’t be taken out of single player sessions. 

The wonderful world of loot. Don’t forget about the mandatory piles of money either.

 

It’s controlled with mouse and keyboard on the PC and the PS1 controller for PS1. Thankfully, the controls are really well mapable on the PS1 controller. They’re not preset very well but the game allows the player to change the controls to suit their needs and style very well. 

The classes are what really make Diablo. Each one plays very differently. The Warrior has high health and strength, making him ideal for soaking up damage and dishing it out with a sword or an axe. It’s important to keep him well equipped though, going into the lower levels of the dungeon with a crappy armor will lead our hero to certain doom. Then there’s the Sorceror, who’s the Warriors polar opposite. If the Sorceror can find good and useful spell books then he can become a nearly indestructible tank that shoots lightning and destroys everything. The Rogue specializes in using the bow and disarming traps. The traps in the labyrinth can be deadly so it’s really useful to have her around. That being said, this game does have friendly fire so it’s very possible to kill your allies. The issue is that bows don’t do a lot of damage, but she can raise her magic stat higher than the Warrior can so casting spells is a viable option. I dunno, I could never figure out how to play her.

 

Our three heroes. And the Sorceror blows away all the enemies with a mighty Lightning Nova.

 

The Gush

One word, multiplayer. Playing this game with, or against your friends, is a blast. Backing up your Warrior buddy with a hale of arrows or deadly spells will never stop being fun.

The art style and graphics for the game were wonderful for the time and I still think they hold up now. The different environments all look grim, dark, and foreboding– like a good dungeon should. There are a lot of pallet-swapped enemies with different names but their design is so solid and interesting that I don’t even care.

You take the gold ogre, I’ll take the blue one. 

I don’t know if the PC port had this but the PS1 version has a whole history of the world available at the main menu. The story of this world was really engrossing to me. I know that Lazarus has left mad journals all around the PC and PS1 versions of the labyrinth but I thought that listening to the history plain was super cool. Sometimes I would just boot up Diablo just to listen to the back story.

The characters in this game are great. I love talking to all of them about whatever they want to talk about. From Farnham’s drunken ramblings with wisdom tucked inside to Cain’s mysterious stories– how does he know so much anyway?– I love hearing all of it. My favorite NPC is definetly Wirt, the Peg Legged Boy. After he got his leg ripped off by angry demons he decided to get back at them by becoming a small entrepreneur, providing you with some of the highest end gear money can buy. Best bit part though must go to the wounded Townsman outside the labyrinth entrance.

This guy’s speech tells the player everything they need to know about the plot and pumps the player up to kill some demons.

 

I also like demolishing hordes of monsters. The bigger the horde, the better. Don’t care how much loot or experience points they offer, I’m just glad to destroy all the little hell spawned buggers. 

 

The Kvetch

Two words, single player. Playing this game alone is the ultimate sadness. The presence of that other player sharing the adventure is vital to the enjoyment of this game. Maybe it’s just me, but playing this game alone is empty.

The PS1 port. Here’s everything wrong with it. It takes up 12 of 15 memory card blocks, so you can only have 3 characters on the same card. Playing multiplayer slows down each of the character’s movement and makes the characters stick together so coordinating movement can be difficult. The game’s graphics and art had to be compressed to fit on the PS1 so everything just looks uglier overall. Menu surfing can be difficult because of the strange controls. The PS1 has auto-targetting for spells since there’s no cursor to target enemies with. This thing will always point at the most useless target is possibly can making the dear sorceror waste oodles and oodles of mana points blasting at enemies one at a time. The walking speed is also atrociously slow.

Acid beasts. These enemies are un-fun to fight. Any of the ranged attacking enemies are un-fun to fight but these guys are the worst. Enemies that can attack from afar abuse this fact, they’ll run and shoot over their shoulders at you the whole while. But when you kill these guys they leave acid pools that can deal a lot of damage so chasing the rest of the pack is even more difficult.

The best part of this game is the co-op, so the worst part of it is the friendly fire. I’ve accidentally killed my partner too many times. One stray lightning bolt or sword swing can totally demolish someone.

Gold shouldn’t take up inventory space. I know it’s not realistic but it makes gold a burden instead of sweet treasure.

Those inventory slots get mighty scarce when they’re filled from wall to wall with gold.

The durability system is butts. If your item runs out of durability it disappears from your character and is gone forever. This can be so frustrating when it’s been a long time since you went to town and then poof, there’s goes your sweet sword. Gotta find another one.

 

The Kvush

Town portal is a spell that allows the player to teleport back to town and that’s awesome. What’s more awesome is being able to learn the spell by finding the spell book for it. What’s not awesome is not finding the spell book and having to continue to use scrolls when you’ve got the skill to learn it from a book that you just haven’t been lucky enough to find. Maybe I’m looking a gift horse in the mouth but at early levels 150 gold is a lot to dish out every time I got back to town.

 

The Verdict

This game is still solid but is completely outclassed by it’s sequel. Diablo II is the more rapidly available game and the superior game overall. If you need the trip down memory lane or are interested in the history of the series then Diablo 1 is a good play but I would only recommend it for the hardcore fan.

Next Week: Legend of the Mystical Ninja.

 

Spyro the Dragon (Playstation 1)

 

Introduction

Gnasty Gnorc– pronounced Nasty Norc– is an orc who is relatively nasty. During a news interview with an Elder Dragon of the Dragon realms the Elder Dragon calls Gnasty ugly. The Gnorc flies into a rage and uses his magic to encase all of the dragons in crystal– using his satellite wand or something. Every dragon except Spyro, a dragon young and small enough to miss. Gnasty is using his magic to turn the Dragon’s treasure into soldiers to conquer the world– presumably, otherwise he’s just making dudes to make more dudes because he’s an extremely lonely Gnorc. Spyro will have to use his fire breath, horns, and gliding ability to free his draconic brethren and defeat this Dragon-hater.

The Gnorc himself. He’s a pretty imposing dude, although I doubt the effectiveness of his golden armor.

 

Development

Spyro the Dragon was made by Insomniac Games, best known for the Spyro series and the Ratchet and Clank series. The Chief Architect, Alex Hastings, created one of the first fully 3D panoramic experiences for the Playstation 1 with this game.

The music was composed and performed by Stewart Copeland, the former drummer for the Police. His music shows the quality of a professional musician and is one of the most memorable aspects of the game.

Fun Fact: Spyro was originally going to be green but the designer’s thought it would be to easy to lose Spyro in grass and other green backgrounds so they made him purple instead.

Spyro the Dragon was released on September 10th, 1998. It would release against MediEvil (PS1), Metal Gear Solid (PS1), Fallout 2(PC), and Resident Evil: The Director’s Cut (PS1).

 

Between the grass, crystal dragon, and enemies it’s clear to see why Green Spyro would have been a terrible idea.

 

 

 

The Nostalgia

Does anyone out there remember demo disks? Once upon a time game companies would release disks with early sections of games so that consumers could see if they wanted to get the full product. One of my favorite Demos was the Spyro Demo. It only had three levels in it but I would play those levels for hours, wondering how to unlock the others. I didn’t know they couldn’t be unlocked but finding everything in them helped me find everything in them when I got the full game.

Hours spent wandering around the same areas waiting to get the full game.

 

Gameplay

In order to free all of the other Dragons Spyro is going to need to travel to all of the Dragons’ worlds and all of those world’s areas. The Dragon finding is actually the easiest part of the game. They’re typically in obvious locations and even if the Spyro can’t see one they shake from time to time, making a distinct noise that’s easy to make out.

Spyro needs to find all of the treasure, which is dropped my monsters as well as hidden all over the world. This is probably the most difficult part of the game because if there’s one errant gem missing then Spyro’s screwed. There’s no real way to detect the treasure so you’ll just have to look everywhere, draw maps of the area, and mark all of the places that you’ve been. Alright, it’s usually not that hard but there will always be that one gem that’s missing.

Spyro also needs to find the 12 dragon eggs that were stolen by a group of dastardly thieves. The thieves are pretty quick but aren’t really a problem. They also jeer Spyro by saying “Nyanya” and blowing raspberries– because taunting the dragon sounds like a great idea!

Spyro’s got 3 main moves, he can charge, jump and glide, and breath fire. Breathing fire is Spyro’s main mode of attack but some enemies and objects are wearing or made of metal and dragon breath doesn’t go through metal– for reasons that escape me scientifically, logically, or magically (I guess I just rolled with it when I was a kid). Enemies that wear metal armor are prime targets for a well placed charge, charging also makes Spyro move faster so it makes travel less of a hassle.

 

General rule, small enemies get charged and large enemies get flamed.

 

 

 

Spyro’s health is represented by Sparx, the dragonfly that accompanies him on every adventure. Sparx can take three hits before he disappears, leaving Spyro on his own. Torching or charging sheep and other fodder animals release butterflies for Sparx to eat. Sparx will also pick up nearby treasure so it’s a great idea to keep him around.

Some levels feature boss enemies that are supposed to be more difficult to handle but they’re not for the most part. The levels are tough, don’t get me wrong, but the bosses themselves are usually not more effective than the armies they bring with them. That being said fighting 3 wolves and a giant scarecrow can be tough.

This is the Scarecrow in question. I think he’s just big enough to seem threatening without being scary.

 

The Gush

Even today this game looks great. Some of the enemy design is really cool and varied, from bulls to shamans every enemy looks cool. It also boasts some of the largest level sizes for the Playstation, using clever programming tricks to keep the memory use down. The levels aren’t just expansive, some of them are downright mystic and beautiful. It definitely looks like a group of Dragons made some of these places.

Dragons that Spyro save usually have interesting advice or comments to make about the world. But Dragons with the most badass of names– Thor, Crusher, etc– are usually feeble and old. I thought it was the funniest thing when I was a kid.

The loading screens are pretty cool and the load times are surprisingly short.

There’s a relaxing quality to watching Spyro glide across a cloudy sky.

 

The music for this game is really good. I’ll find myself grooving to the bass and drum beats all through gameplay. Each level has it’s own unique tune. Some of them sound similar, but they all have their unique bits.

Gliding around is just fun, all there is too it. Reaching the highest point of levels and just gliding round is awesome.

 

The Kvetch

The story in this game is pretty weak. Gnasty is supposed to be an underprivileged Gnorc who saw his reflection in the Dragon’s treasure as something nearly unbearable because he was so ugly. When he tried to destroy the treasure so that it couldn’t reflect his appearance the Dragons sent him to the junk yard of their worlds and he swears revenge. This makes Gnasty a strangely sympathetic villain but most importantly it gives him some sort of motivation for doing what he does as opposed to the nothing the game provides.

Speaking of Gnasty, the final fight against him is really anticlimactic. He goes down in one hit, the whole “fight” is just about getting to him or keeping up with him while the platforms in the level recede into walls.

Some pieces of treasure are insanely well hidden. And you need all of it to unlock Gnasty’s Loot, the super secret final level. Some levels also form strange mazes so it’s really difficult to remember where you’ve been. In later games Sparx can point Spyro toward treasure and it solves the issue but this isn’t the later games.

Worlds are gated by mysterious balloonists. They ask for Spyro to have enough treasure, Dragon’s, or Dragon Eggs before he can take Spyro to the next world, but why? Spyro doesn’t pay him the treasure, eggs, or Dragons. Why does he need to know that Spyro’s got this stuff?

Tree Tops. Just, Tree Tops. This level is a nightmare filled with super charge ramps, keys, and treasure chests. It’s so easy to screw something up in this stage and if you do, you’ve got to start all over because there’s no way back to Tree Tops you’ve passed.

This level looks beautiful but it’s masquerading as Hell.

 

The Verdict

This game is absolutely worth playing but is not worth completing 100%. The sequels remedy the problems with getting 100% and I think that shows that Insomniac was just a little green when making this game– it was only the second game they had made. Nostalgia levels are really high but this game is just good. If you’ve got a hankering to play as a small Dragon and save Dragon-kind then this is the game for you.

Next week: Diablo.

Crash Bandicoot (Sony Playstation)

Introduction

The nefarious Dr. Neo Cortex is engineering animals from his island fortress to be soldiers in his bid for world domination.  Crash is a failed experiment who escapes…. somehow… for reasons. Help Crash wreck Cortex’s islands and save his girlfriend from being turned into the general of Cortex’s army (More damsels in distress… ugh).

At least I think that’s what the backstory is, the opening scene jumps around a lot.

Development

Crash Bandicoot was developed by the three man development effort known as Naughty Dog and was published through Universal Interactive Studios– the fact that three guys made this game astonishes me. Naughty Dog was composed of Andy Gavin, Jason Rubin, and Dave Bagget– who was hired later in the game’s creation. They decided to jump into the 3D world with a classic genre of game, action platformer. They chose to release for the Playstation because it seemed less clunky than the alternatives like the Atari Jaguar, Sega 32X, and Sega Saturn– if these consoles don’t sound familiar there’s a good reason for that, they’re terrible.

I’m sorry if you owned one of these.

They wanted the game to have a Sonic the Hedgehog vibe so they made the setting a clash between nature and technology and made the character an anthropomorphized version of an unheard of animal. They jokingly called the game “Sonic’s Ass Game” because the camera would only view Crash from behind. They chose the Bandicoot from a list of animals from Australian and Tasmanian animals. Other animals from Australia and Tasmania, like potoroos and koalas, would join the cast of villains.

This is a Bandicoot. Crash scarcely resembles him.

Crash Bandicoot was released in August, 1996. It was up against The Elder Scrolls 2: Daggerfall, Diablo, and Super Mario 64.

Staring squarely at the hindquarters of our valiant protagonist.

Nostalgia

In 1996 you were either a Playstation kid or a Nintendo 64 kid. You either took a gamble on a new system with new mascots or kept playing Mario games. And that was a big gamble to take. Someone’s first foray into 3D platforming in this divide is either going to be Mario 64 or Crash Bandicoot. My father got me a playstation so my game was Crash Bandicoot. I could go left, right, forward, back, up, and down, it blew my mind! I could go anywhere, do anything! But Crash has so many boundaries. The game is mostly a linear path with a little wiggle room to the right and left. Some of the most fun levels are actually returns to the 2D form. It was a sign of what was possible, but also felt very limiting which is the game in a nutshell really.

GO ANYWHERE, DO ANYTHING! Like doing the same things of last generation but slightly better and with a better paint job.

Gameplay

The goal of each level is to reach its end, enemies and pits will impede your progress forward. Jump over the pits and jump on or spin attack the enemy. It’s pretty Marioesque, boxes hold fruit which Crash can collect for extra lives and Crash can only take one hit unless he finds powerups to protect him. This one of the first platformers that I can remember where the protagonist actually has a melee attack, he can do more than just jump on things. And Crash’s spin attack was deadly at best and humorous at worst, arms akimbo cartoonishly lashing out. The most fun levels are the ones with the craziest gimmicks, 2D levels, pig riding levels, rock fleeing levels. The additional challenge of each level lies in breaking all the Marioesque boxes in the level, but more on that later.

The Kvetch

This game was really good for its time but it has not aged well. The Playstation’s disk storage capacity was great for making games look better but save data couldn’t be saved on a disk. So the Playstation had memory cards but no one knew what those were at launch because no other system needed them before. This created some problems for the game. Naughty Dog figured that no one would no what memory cards were so Crash had a password system but passwords get to be 32 characters long. I had sheets of paper with passwords and I could never remember which was the most up to date. And Crash can only save in bonus levels which can only be accessed by finding randomly placed pictures of his girlfriend hidden in boxes in each level. It was so frustrating I would try to beat the whole game in one sitting and it’s just not possible.

One of the last password screens in gaming history and with good reason.

The only way to unlock the secret ending is to get gems, Crash gets gems by breaking all the boxes in each stage. Some boxes can only be reached by getting certain gems, so sometimes you think you’ve gotten all the boxes but you haven’t and don’t know why. Some levels break into 2 paths, both of which have boxes. Which means Crash has to backtrack through levels and that’s easier said than done.

This is the standard camera, you can’t see what’s behind you. So backtracking is a matter of memorization.

The Gush

This all being said the game is pretty fun if you’re not trying to complete it. The art is really good, especially for the time. The jungles, forts, labs, and castles all look really interesting with little bits to notice. The level design is really solid, it’s easy to find the rhythm of jumps and spins to defeat levels.

My favorite part of the game though is the boss fights. Did you ever want to fight a body-building Koala? There’s a boss for that. Did you ever want to fight a small mammal that’s been genetically experimented on so hard it became a mobster? There’s a boss for that.

This is the only level where Crash will take cover, but with good reason.

Did you ever want to fight a mad scientist that hulks out during the fight? There’s a boss for that.

This fight has actually glitched out on me more often than it hasn’t. It’s still super fun though!

The Verdict

This game’s too hard to complete but too easy to finish. It’s in this weird difficulty anti-sweet spot. I might play it to walk down the memory lane of beating Pinstripe Potoroo, but probably not. Like many first attempts , the sequel fixes most of these problems but this isn’t the sequel.

Next Week: Sonic the Hedgehog 2.